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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and derinking habits in five Australia cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and derinking habits in five Australia cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The bar graph demonstrates the evaluation of five different places that exist in Australia (Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane,
Adelaide
Use synonyms
, and Hobart) for their
coffee
Use synonyms
 and
tea
Use synonyms
 consumption habits in the
last
Linking Words
 four weeks. The habits are categorized on three different scales: buying fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
, buying
instant
Use synonyms
coffee
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, and going to a cafe for
coffee
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 or
tea
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, the highest proportions belong to the
category
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 of going to a cafe for
coffee
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 or
tea
Use synonyms
 in four
cities
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. The only city is
Adelaide
Use synonyms
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 has a different
category
Use synonyms
 for the highest proportion, which is buying
instant
Use synonyms
coffee
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.
Additionally
Linking Words
, the percentage of people buying
instant
Use synonyms
coffee
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 was always higher than that of those purchasing fresh
coffee
Use synonyms
 in all
cities
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. In detail, Melbourne, Sydney, Hobart, and Brisbane nearly have percentages of 64%, 63%, 61%, and 56%, respectively, for the
category
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 of going to a cafe for
coffee
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 and
tea
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. For
Adelaide
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, the highest percentage is nearly 50% for the
category
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 of bought
instant
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coffee
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.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the lowest proportions for all
cities
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 belong to the
category
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 of buying fresh
coffee
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. The minimum proportion among the
cities
Use synonyms
 belongs to Brisbane with 33%, followed by
Adelaide
Use synonyms
 with 34%.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words adelaide, coffee, tea, instant, category, cities with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
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