Task 2: Some people want governments to spend money looking for life on other planets. Others, however, think this is a waste of public money when there are so many problems on earth. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Some
people
say that governments
should spend money
looking for life on other planets. However
, I strongly believe this
is a waste of public money
when there are so many problems on Earth that need to be prioritized.
On the one hand, governments
needing
to spend Wrong verb form
need
money
looking for life on other planets because nowadays people
feeling
more unsafe, Add a missing verb
are feeling
such
as covid 19 is one of the global crises, and under
Change preposition
apply
this
phenomenon even some country they
have Replace the word
countries
lot
of funds, but they still couldn’t do anything difference, and they must deal with the pandemic the same with rest of the word. Change the article
a lot
For example
, Switzerland is the country having
the best Wrong verb form
that has
beneficial
Replace the word
benefits
to
Change preposition
for
their
citizens. Correct pronoun usage
its
However
, they share the same fate as other countries in the pandemic.
On the other hand
, I believe that there are many problems on earth that need to priority such
as famine in Africa or war in some parts of the world still going on, leading to thousands of people
dying. So, instead
of spending money
on other invisible lives, some solution should be found to take care of and help people
in this
situation.
Another reason is that climate change is also
a major problem, climate change leading to an increase in average global temperature. So, all governments
should take more action and spend more money
in order to improve the global environment. For example
, the government should spend money
to invest in electric vehicle infrastructure to reduce CO2 to
the climate.
In conclusion, Change preposition
in
while
some people
want governments
to spend money
looking for life on other planets, it seems to me that this
is a waste of public money
when there are so many problems on EarthSubmitted by luantrat on
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task achievement
Your essay presents clear arguments for both sides of the issue, which is good. However, the main points are not entirely well-supported and sometimes lack depth. Try to provide more comprehensive and detailed ideas to strengthen your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which is a plus. Nonetheless, the logical structure can still be improved. Some points seem slightly disjointed or underdeveloped. Ensure that every paragraph smoothly transitions from one idea to the next.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear and relevant structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion clearly addressing the topic.
task achievement
You've used relevant examples, such as mentioning COVID-19 and climate change, to support your arguments. This helps make your essay more concrete and believable.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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