Buying things on the internet such as book, air ticket and groceries is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages.
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Submitted by monm8097 on
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Introduction
Your essay lacks a clear introduction that specifically addresses the topic and outlines your position. Make sure to provide an introductory paragraph that introduces the topic and clearly states your thesis, addressing the advantages and disadvantages of online shopping.
Conclusion
The essay does not have a proper conclusion. Sum up your arguments and restate your position clearly in the concluding paragraph. This will reinforce the points you've made throughout the essay and provide a sense of closure.
Coherence
The coherence of your essay could be greatly improved by organizing your ideas into clear paragraphs with topic sentences. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea or argument.
Cohesion
Use a range of linking words and phrases to help the reader follow your arguments. Avoid repetition and aim for a logical flow of ideas throughout the essay. Work on clear paragraphing to improve cohesion.
Task Response
The task requires you to discuss both the advantages and disadvantages of online shopping and to articulate whether one outweighs the other. Ensure that you address both sides thoroughly and provide specific examples to support your points.
Development
The essay needs more developed ideas and arguments. Expand on your points, provide clear reasoning, and support your arguments with relevant examples. Avoid generalizations and strive to show depth in your response.
Accuracy
Check your grammar and spelling. Errors can make it difficult for the reader to understand your points. Use punctuation correctly and proofread your essay to avoid these issues.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.