Some parent grow their children in strict discipline while others leave them free to learn lessons of lives on their own. Which is one of these is better approach and why?

Parenting methods vary widely, with some advocating strict
discipline
and others prioritizing
children
's
autonomy
in learning.
This
essay delves into the merits of both approaches to discern the more effective method for a
child
's development. Strict
discipline
establishes a crucial foundation for a
child
's growth.
For example
, enforcing designated study hours and household responsibilities
instills
Change the spelling
instils
show examples
invaluable time-management skills and a sense of accountability. These structured routines teach
children
the importance of prioritizing tasks and managing their time effectively.
Moreover
, adherence to rules,
such
as completing chores before playtime, fosters
discipline
and responsibility. These attributes form the groundwork for success, nurturing self-
discipline
and a robust work ethic necessary for academic and personal achievements. Granting
children
autonomy
fosters crucial decision-making skills. Allowing them to select extracurricular activities or hobbies encourages independence and self-exploration.
For instance
, enabling a
child
to choose between learning a musical instrument or participating in sports nurtures their individual interests and personal development. When
children
have the freedom to explore and decide, they develop decision-making abilities, enhance creativity, and gain confidence.
This
autonomy
instills
Change the spelling
instils
show examples
a sense of ownership over their choices, vital for their emotional and cognitive growth. In conclusion,
while
both strict
discipline
and
autonomy
offer distinct advantages, a balanced approach integrating elements of both methods appears most conducive to a
child
's holistic development. Establishing boundaries
while
nurturing independence enables
children
to cultivate essential life skills within a structured yet adaptable framework, preparing them comprehensively for the complexities of adulthood.
Submitted by nttung.182 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay shows good logical structure, with paragraphs that are well-developed and connected. Each paragraph introduces its main idea clearly and supports it throughout. However, to improve further, ensure that transitions between ideas are seamless and that there is a clear progression of thoughts from one sentence to the next.
coherence cohesion
To attain a higher coherence and cohesion score, use a wider range of cohesive devices and vary your sentence structures to demonstrate versatility in your writing. Embed more complex structures and showcase multiple types of linking phrases beyond the basics like 'for example' and 'moreover'.
task achievement
The response to the task is complete, and the essay addresses the prompt directly with a balanced consideration of both parenting styles. However, to enhance your score, ensure that the ideas presented are not only clear but also provide in-depth insight into each argument. Develop your points further by delving into the implications of these parenting styles.
task achievement
While the essay includes examples, they are somewhat generic. To score higher for task achievement, include more specific and detailed examples to substantiate your points. These examples should be personal, original, or uniquely reflective of the argument rather than common scenarios.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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