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Band 3.5

Some people believe that teachers should be responsible for teaching students the difference between right and wornd. Others say that teachers should only teach academic subjects. Discuss both viewpoints and give our own opinion.

#people #teachers #students #difference #right #wornd #subjects #viewpoints
Some people believe that
teachers
is
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are
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 not only responsible
to teach
Change preposition
for teaching
show examples
 textbook subject but
also
about
Change preposition
for
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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moral things,
while
 others believe
teachers
 should only focus on academic discussion. I will explore both views and give my personal opinion. On one hand, it is indeed important for
teachers
 to focus on academic subjects so they can optimize the academic potential of
children
.
For instance
,
teachers
 can observe
special
Correct article usage
the special
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 skills
on
Change preposition
of
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 their
students
 and give an extra drill of practice.
This
 kind of special
treatement
Correct your spelling
treatment
 can boost
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
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 confidence
of
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in
show examples
 mastering
specific
Add an article
the specific
a specific
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 subject.
Consequently
,
students
 can
achive
Correct your spelling
achieve
 individual awards
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 some academic competitions. On
other
Correct article usage
the other
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 hand, tutors should
also
give
Verb problem
keep
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 an eye
for
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on
show examples
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
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 knowledge related to right and wrong.
Since
Change preposition
From
show examples
 an early age, tutors should
also
 teach
children
 about moral and
norm
Replace the word
normal
show examples
 things because they are the closest person to
students
 in School.
For example
, when
student
Add an article
a student
show examples
 doing an exam and one of them trying to cheat so teacher should give an explanation that cheating is
wrong
Add an article
a wrong
the wrong
show examples
 gesture. As a
results
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result
show examples
,
children
 will not only receive
knowlege
Correct your spelling
knowledge
 but
also
having
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
 good personal character. In
conculsion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
, it is important for
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
 to only focus on
acaemic
Correct your spelling
academic
academics
, but helping
children
 with right and wrong
Fix the agreement mistake
lessons
show examples
lesson
Fix the agreement mistake
lessons
show examples
also
Add a missing verb
is also
show examples
 beneficial for
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
students
Change noun form
students'
show examples
 development.
However
, I personally believe that mentorship
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is critical for juvenile development so
teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
show examples
 should pay attention to the right and wrong things
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
show examples
 behaviour.
Submitted by ryanrush16 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear logical structure by including clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph and linking words to connect ideas.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion should restate the main points more clearly, reflect the prompt accurately, and provide a brief explanation of their significance.
coherence cohesion
Support main points with more detailed explanations or examples to strengthen arguments.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task evenly, ensuring you discuss both viewpoints and your own opinion as prompted.
task achievement
Formulate ideas clearly and comprehensively, ensuring they are expanded upon with sufficient detail.
task achievement
Include more relevant specific examples to illustrate points and support the arguments presented in the essay.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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