IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

You recently ordered a small item online but when it arrived it was unusable. Write a letter to the company that sold you the item: - give details about the order you made - explain what was wrong with the item -tell the company what you want them to do about it Letter writing

#item #company #-tell
Dear Sir / Madam, My name is Maulik Patel, I
had
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
recently purchased
LG
Correct article usage
an LG
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 LED
television
 of 43
inch
Change to a plural noun
inches
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 from your online shopping website. When it
reach
Wrong verb form
reached
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at
Remove the preposition
apply
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my home,
television
Correct article usage
the television
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 box
is
Wrong verb form
was
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 in
open
Add an article
the open
an open
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 position and some Accessories
are
Wrong verb form
were
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 missing and
television
Correct article usage
the television
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is
Wrong verb form
was
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 not working properly, I received
different
Correct article usage
a different
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 size of
television
 which
is not match
Change the verb form
is not matched
is not matching
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with
Change preposition
apply
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my
order
. As per my
order
Fix the agreement mistake
details
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detail
Add a comma
detail,
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 I
was
Verb problem
did
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 not
received
Wrong verb form
receive
show examples
 my
order
 properly, so I request you to please return and cancel my
order
 and refund my bill amount. Thanking you for your support & co-operation. Regards, Maulik Patel
Submitted by jaimini2000 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph presents a separate idea clearly. The second paragraph is lacking clear structure separating the issue description and the resolution request.
coherence cohesion
Use appropriate greetings and sign-offs for formal letters, and include them in separate lines for clarity.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task with more detail, especially explaining the problem with the item and what you would like the company to do instead of just stating a refund request.
task achievement
The tone is somewhat informal for a complaint letter; consider using more formal language and phrases to describe the issue and request.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • faulty
  • dissatisfied
  • rectify
  • refund
  • replacement
  • defective
  • customer service
  • resolve
  • item description
  • online transaction
  • discrepancy
  • compensation
  • order number
  • acknowledgement
  • customer satisfaction
  • prompt action
What to do next:
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