In the modern world¬, it is no longer necessary to use animals as food or other products, such as medicines and clothing. Do you agree or disagree?
In
Add an article
the advance
advance
Replace the word
advanced
world
there is no need to depend on Add a comma
world,
animals
for diet
and medication and dresses
.Fix the agreement mistake
dress
This
essay totally agrees with this
statement because there are many options to fulfill
requirements and Change the spelling
fulfil
due to
advancements in technology Many people's
nowadays are vegetarian they completely depend on vegetables for their Unnecessary verb
people
diet
and this
healthy and complete balance diet
because all the type
of necessary nutrients we can get from different kinds of fruits and green Fix the agreement mistake
types
leafs
like minerals vitamins and protein .Correct your spelling
leaves
moreover
we can also
get medicational properties from variants hurbs
and shrubs .MAny people quit the usage of beef mutton and milk and their Correct your spelling
herbs
diet
are
living Correct subject-verb agreement
is
healthy
Add an article
a healthy
life
.for
example Capitalize word
For
a
research by Remove the article
apply
American
health society Correct article usage
the American
show
that people who consume less Correct subject-verb agreement
shows
carbohydrates containing
food are less likely to get cardiovascular disease.Correct your spelling
carbohydrate-containing
Hence
its
proof that for living Replace the word
it's
it is
life
there is a
option. Other than Change the article
an
animals
. With the growing technology each and every
Correct determiner usage
apply
thing
is made easy peasy for humans Correct your spelling
everything
like
there are many companies which produce synthetic leather which is not made Correct word choice
apply
by
the skin of Change preposition
from
animals
.on
Change preposition
apply
ther
hand pharmaceutical companies Correct your spelling
the
has
been growing rapidly and making medicines from the combination of plants and chemicals .Correct subject-verb agreement
have
For
example
a company Add a comma
example,
im
America made Correct your spelling
in
a
insulin in labs which had been made by the Remove the article
apply
intestine
of Fix the agreement mistake
intestines
ship
Fix the agreement mistake
ships
from
many years .Each and every thing is available in Change preposition
for
market
having Add an article
the market
complete
package so it is Correct article usage
a complete
prove
that there is no need to use Correct your spelling
proven
animals
to live life
in this
era . In conclusion
Add a comma
conclusion,
although
animals
provide many benefits but
there are many alternatives to Remove the conjunction
apply
live
healthy and long Wrong verb form
living
life
without them and in forecoming
there will be no need Correct your spelling
forthcoming
of
Change preposition
for
this
class .Submitted by asrakazmi447 on
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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear and logical progression of ideas. An effective organization structure should include clear paragraphs, each introducing a new idea and progressing smoothly to the next. Transitions between sentences and paragraphs should be used to maintain flow.
coherence cohesion
While an introduction and conclusion are present, both lack a clear thesis statement and summarization of main points, respectively. Make sure your introduction sets out the argument clearly, and your conclusion effectively summarizes the points made without introducing new information.
coherence cohesion
Main points are not adequately supported by specific examples and explanations. For a higher score, substantiate each point with relevant details and clear examples. This develops the argument and demonstrates an understanding of the topic.
task achievement
Your response covers the task, but it is incomplete. A fully developed answer would explore both sides of the argument, even if you agree with one side. Cover all parts of the task question thoroughly.
task achievement
Your ideas are pertinent to the topic, but lack clarity and depth. Aim for well-articulated points that convey your ideas unambiguously and with comprehensive detail.
task achievement
Use more relevant and specific examples to support your argument. Whilst some examples are provided, they are generic and do not convincingly back the essay's stance. Detailed examples enhance the reader's understanding and the essay's persuasiveness.
Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.
A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).
Stick to this essay structure:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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