In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities. Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both views?
Transportation is an essential part of people around the world. Some believe it is crucial to invest in building new
fast track
railways as it will reduce Add a hyphen
fast-track
traveling
time. I believe that improvement of the current public transport should be given more priority and Change the spelling
travelling
government
should invest more Correct article usage
the government
on
the infrastructure as it will gain more attention of people. Change preposition
in
This
essay will discuss both views.
To begin
with, railway lines for fast track
trains offer significant benefits including, reducing Add a hyphen
fast-track
traveling
time for commuters. Change the spelling
travelling
Moreover
, it will also
promote in
the alleviation of traffic which Change preposition
apply
also
advantageous for people Add a missing verb
is also
traveling
on the roads. Change the spelling
travelling
For example
, metropolitan Cities have widespread of
rail networks which aids passengers to reach their desired destination within minutes Change preposition
apply
comparing
other mode of transportation which requires more time.
Wrong verb form
compared to
However
, The government should spend significantly more funds on the current local transport such
as bus
or local trains, to improve their infrastructure. Fix the agreement mistake
buses
This
is because it is widely used by the locals on the
daily basis. Correct article usage
a
Furthermore
, Enhancement
of local transportation will not only attract locals but it will gain Correct article usage
the Enhancement
attention
of the foreigners. Add an article
the attention
For instance
, international tourism will be attracted to local buses or trains if it has good amenities to offer and ensure safety
of passengers.
Add an article
the safety
To conclude
, investing in Newer networks and routes will require a huge amount and burden on the government. In my opinion, local authorities should spend more money and budget on the enhancement of current public transport as it will be more beneficial to them and to the publicSubmitted by haroonamrose61 on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, you may need to work on the seamless flow of ideas from one paragraph to the other to improve the logical progression.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your ideas are fully expanded upon in each paragraph, providing detailed support for your statements. Each paragraph should contain one clear main idea with an explanation or example.
task achievement
The overall response to the task is adequate but needs to go into more depth. Your answer could benefit from more specific examples and a clearer argument to fully satisfy the question prompt. Additionally, you could balance the discussion more evenly between the two views presented.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?