Some people thik that getting a degree from univeristy is the best way to guarantee the job, other believe that it would be better to gain experience first. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #thik #univeristy #guarantee #job #gain #first

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Some

people

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support the notion that obtaining a

college

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degree

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is the best way to secure a

job

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while

Linking Words

others think that acquiring

experience

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is more important. Both arguments have their own claims, but I am more inclined to the opinion of gaining a

degree

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from a

university

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for future jobs. In general, it takes an average of a four-year period to eventually gain a

college

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degree

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. During the process of study completion,

people

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who went through

university

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degrees acquired experiences knowledge, and

skills

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in their majors.

Furthermore

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, organizational experiences and presentation

skills

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are

also

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important components in preparing students to get better

job

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opportunities during

university

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Besides

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, the majority of companies require a bachelor's

degree

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for their applicants as the minimum requirement to apply at their workplace.

Hence

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people

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who obtained a

degree

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from

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university

Correct article usage

a university

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have advantages over others who do not in that context.

On the other hand

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, it does not mean

people

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who gain

experience

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first make the wrong decision . Certain jobs,

for example

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such

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as part-time jobs, freelancers, or tech companies usually do not need a specific

degree

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and prioritizing

skills

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required to meet the

job

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descriptions. Hard

skills

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as coding, and product design, are types of

skills

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which not rely on obtaining a

college

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degree

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but can be learned by being self-taught.

Therefore

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, getting

experience

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to secure a

job

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rather than merely a

degree

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also

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works to land a

job

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for one. In conclusion, gaining a

college

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degree

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has

Change the article

the

show examples

advantage to

Wrong verb form

being

show examples

better prepared and to

fulfill

Change the spelling

fulfil

show examples

minimum requirements for a large number of companies to get a

job

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. But, it is not automatically undermining

people

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who prioritize gaining

experience

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first as there is a different path for them to apply and get hired.

Submitted by pedrothedawn on Sat Dec 02 2023

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coherence cohesion

Make sure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and that the supporting sentences are directly relevant to this idea. Avoid introducing new topics without proper explanation or linking them to the main argument.

coherence cohesion

Work on constructing stronger, clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to guide the reader through your argument.

coherence cohesion

Enhance the logical flow of the essay by using a broader range of cohesive devices. This could include sequencing words like 'firstly,' 'secondly,' as well as contrast indicators like 'however' or 'on the other hand.',

task achievement

For a fully developed response, try to incorporate more detailed and specific examples to support your main points. Allowing the reader to understand the practical implications of your argument.

task achievement

While the overall response completes the task, strive to cover all aspects of the prompt more evenly. Ensure that both views and your own opinion are given equal consideration and development throughout the essay.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
7
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

291 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

comprehensive theoretical foundation
critical thinking skills
job market
networking opportunities
internships
theoretical knowledge
practical experience
workplace dynamics
hands-on skills
work environment
formal qualifications
real-world settings
adapt to
employers
candidates
practical skills
formal degrees
work experience
industries

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Some people thik that getting a degree from univeristy is the best way to guarantee the job, other believe that it would be better to gain experience first. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that a person can never understand the culture of a country unless they speak the language. Do you agree with this opinion?

In today's world, many people use mobile phones and the Internet to communicate with others. This has resulted in the use of new words and different forms of spelling and grammar. Are they a positive or negative development?

In today’s world, private companies rather than the government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that the violence shown in movies and video games has a damaging effect on society. While others believe that these don’t have an influence on people’s behaviour. What is your opinion?