IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

Describe a writer you would like to meet. You should say: who the writer is what you know about this writer already what you would like to find out about him/her and explain why you would like to meet this writer

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To describe a writer, he is a monk and a leader of 7 million Tibetans inside and outside of Tibet. He is
non-other
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none other
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 than His Holiness the Dalai Lama. I am familiar with his writings on Buddhist psychology , which remind me about compassion, and how it helps one's own mind to keep calm and non-reactive towards harmful actions or faulty language spoken to oneself. It was stated in one of his writings that the compassionate mind helped him to survive his spirit. The eagerness came from that statement in one of his books that I want to meet him in person to ask him how that helped him to stay spirited. It was in his biography that he
did have
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had a tough time in the late 1950s when he lost his country’s Independence and had to flee his own country
Submitted by rinchennima77 on

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coherence cohesion
There is a need to work on the overall structure of the response. Ensure you have a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Additionally, paragraphs should be well-developed and ideas should flow logically from one to the next, connecting them with appropriate cohesive devices.
task achievement
To improve your task achievement score, ensure that you fully address all parts of the prompt. Provide more detailed responses on what you would like to find out about the writer and explain more thoroughly why you want to meet them. Also, include a wider range of specific and relevant examples to support your points.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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