IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement ?

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Applicable scientific research today has captivated a lot especially if that way could have improved human
lives
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. Other than that, the purpose of scientific breakthroughs should engage with either the
quality
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 or quantity of mankind’s activity. I personally agree that
this
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 resolution must be beneficial to human
lives
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, and I would explain the following reasons that contribute to my standpoint. Globalization is a dynamic parameter for human living beings worldwide. In that situation, the breakthrough of the
technology
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 is really demanding. It is because the evidence that might come out must be practically applied. Since
people
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 have to allocate their
time
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 thoroughly on a daily basis, using the chatting feature through mobile phones or application methods seems fascinating. Food provider hands over that chance to get more revenue.
Such
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 a message is used for elderly
people
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 who are not familiar with the technologies, meanwhile, the application seems used with youngsters. It is clear enough that using
technology
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 is improving human
quality
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 in terms of
time
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 management. Other than that, advancing applicable science could deteriorate the human life
quality
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. The most noticeable one is the health. Most
people
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 using
technology
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 make them have quite less physical activity and sedentary lifestyles because they do not have to go to the store directly, just click on from their mobile phones. As
time
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 goes by, it would contribute to another problem that
people
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 have to face,
instead
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 of the outstanding
technology
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 itself.
In addition
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, the sense of connectivity through
people
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 as social creatures is lesser than before. It kind of advancing
technology
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 has a prolonged impact towards
people
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’s health. All in all, scientific research expects
people
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 who looking to improve
the
Correct article usage
apply
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human
lives
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. From my point of view, I do really agree that
this
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 condition surely affected
people
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’s
lives
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 not only the
quality
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 but
also
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 the quantity when it comes to managing
time
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 scheduling.
In contrast
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, some are impacted by that condition affecting the health
quality
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 of individuals as well.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical structure to your essay by using strong topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph and clear transitions between ideas.
coherence cohesion
Develop your introduction and conclusion more fully; the introduction should provide a clear response to the prompt and your conclusion should summarize your main points effectively.
coherence cohesion
Support your main points consistently with clear, developed examples and explanations. Avoid broad generalizations without specific, relevant evidence.
task achievement
Address the task prompt fully by providing a clear position throughout your response and developing your argument with a balanced discussion of both sides.
task achievement
Present clear, comprehensive ideas. Aim for depth rather than breadth in your argumentation, ensuring that each point is fully explored and explained.
task achievement
Provide specific examples to support your points. These examples can be drawn from your own experience, historical events, or factual situations that clearly relate to the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • enhancing
  • quality of human life
  • advancements
  • medicine
  • healthcare
  • scientific research
  • solving societal problems
  • improving living standards
  • global issues
  • climate change
  • food scarcity
  • technological advancements
  • limitations
  • negative consequences
  • ethical considerations
  • sustainability
  • environmental preservation
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