The idea of having a single career is becoming an old fashioned one. The new fashion mil be to have several careers or ways of earning money and further education will be something that continues throughout life.

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Living in
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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modernized society and becoming much more adapted,
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

issue lead to
have
Wrong verb form
having

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb have. Consider changing it.

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various occupation or
gain
Wrong verb form
gaining

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb gain. Consider changing it.

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tremendous
Correct article usage
a tremendous

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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amount
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

money
Change preposition
of money

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, some
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

assert having a single job can be enough. In
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay both having
single
Add an article
a single

The noun phrase single job seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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job and
multi professional
Add a hyphen
multi-professional

It seems that multi professional is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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will be stated. To embark
on
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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, some
workholic
Correct your spelling
workaholic
workaholics

If you don’t want workholic to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

entertained
Add a missing verb
are entertained

It seems that you are missing a verb. Consider adding it.

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by working and earning
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. They have
enormous
Add an article
an enormous

The noun phrase enormous tendency seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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tendency to possess
amenity
Fix the agreement mistake
amenities

It seems that amenity may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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in
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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society
therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, possessing several careers can
response
Replace the word
respond

The word response doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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throughout
Change preposition
to

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

's expenditure.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, individuals who enjoy
multi
Correct word choice
multiple

There may be an adjective issue here.

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skills might the best
deeds is
Verb problem
to

There may be a verb use issue here.

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exhibit
there
Replace the word
their

The word there may be used incorrectly. Review the following notes to determine the appropriate usage for your context.

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performance in
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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particular situation.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, athletes
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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need
to
Correct your spelling
too

The word to doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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much
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

until covered
there
Replace the word
their

The word there may be used incorrectly. Review the following notes to determine the appropriate usage for your context.

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cost of professional. on the other
hands
Fix the agreement mistake
hand

It seems that hands may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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, some
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

allege they
do
Verb problem
are

There may be a verb use issue here.

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not
require
Wrong verb form
required

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb require. Consider changing it.

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to have extra jobs so, they claim that work
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

should be balanced
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

type of
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

believe
taking
Change preposition
in taking

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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pleasure in
there
Correct your spelling
their

The word there doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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own
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. Individuals assume that
single
Correct article usage
a single

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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career is enough to maintain
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

life
Correct article usage
a life

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

show examples
span,
note
Correct your spelling
not

The word note doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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only
have
Change the verb form
has

The plural verb have does not appear to agree with the singular subject note. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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a
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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spare time
to
Change preposition
for

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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their family but
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

they can manage other hobbies. in conclusion, considering
to
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

fact, living
the
Change preposition
in the

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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updated association has been materialistic more than before and well
being
Verb problem
well-being

There may be a verb use issue here.

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humankind
Change preposition
of humankind

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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has been mentioned, the common sense of various
occupation
Fix the agreement mistake
occupations

It seems that occupation may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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alter to novel approach to gain
money
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
nevertheless
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it is significant to
be
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb be appears to be unnecessary here.

show examples
possesed
Correct your spelling
possess

If you don’t want possesed to be marked as misspelled in the future, you can add it to your personal dictionary.

of moderation
life
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

better than
any things
Correct your spelling
anything

The word any things doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

show examples
.

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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks clear and logical progression of ideas. The introduction should clearly present the topic and outline the main points to be discussed. Each paragraph should focus on a single idea, which should be supported by examples or explanations. The conclusion should summarize the points made and restate the position. Aim for a more structured approach, where each point leads naturally to the next, and use cohesive devices effectively to achieve this.
task achievement
The essay partially addresses the topic but falls short in achieving complete task response. Both sides of the argument - having a single career and having multiple careers - are mentioned, but the discussion is not developed thoroughly. To improve, expand on the ideas presented, offer deeper analysis or examples, and ensure that each paragraph adds to the overall argument or narrative. Be more detailed in your explanations, justify your opinions, and ensure you stay on topic throughout the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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