Of late, it is believed that students studying in secondary school and high school should be taught how to manage money as it is an important life skill. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this argument?

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Nowadays, some people think that students learn about how to manage
money
Use synonyms
as it is an important life skill from secondary school and high school. If they know about
Linking Words
this
Correct determiner usage
these
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things,
then
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they easily
managed
Wrong verb form
manage
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. I totally agree with
this
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statement and I will explain the reason in
this
Linking Words
essay.
To begin
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with, It is a good thought
learn
Fix the infinitive
to learn
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about
money
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and how to tackle
and
Correct pronoun usage
it and
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why it is so important. To explain,
money
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is play
Change the verb form
plays
show examples
important
Correct article usage
an important
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role in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
everyone
Change noun form
everyone's
show examples
life. If we are not understanding how to use and manage,
then
Linking Words
we face challenges in life. As per a survey by The WHO report, every
years
Change to a singular noun
year
show examples
a lot of people status move from rich people to poverty, because they have no
skill
Fix the agreement mistake
skills
show examples
to manage.
Moreover
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, when children
learned
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
in school, they have knowledge of various
precespective
Correct your spelling
perspectives
like investment, and
save
Wrong verb form
saving
show examples
money
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.
On the other hand
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, If
anythings
Fix the agreement mistake
anything
show examples
has pros
then
Linking Words
absolutely some corns. If taught in schools,
then
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few
student
Change to a plural noun
students
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more interested in
money
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rather than
study
Wrong verb form
studying
show examples
and find easy and shortcut
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
show examples
for earning
Change preposition
to earn
show examples
money
Use synonyms
. As per a report by BBC News, in
this
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modren
Correct your spelling
modern
world, children are doing many types
Change preposition
of works
show examples
works
Correct subject-verb agreement
work
show examples
, starting a job, and criminal activities.
While
Linking Words
they are the future of the nation, we have tried to guide and help them. In conclusion, if we are looking at both these arguments,
then
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found
Wrong verb form
find
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solution
Correct article usage
a solution
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its more
benfits
Correct your spelling
benefits
Linking Words
then
Correct your spelling
than
show examples
loss
Fix the agreement mistake
losses
show examples
. The adults easily understand
Correct article usage
the values
show examples
values
Fix the agreement mistake
value
show examples
of
money
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
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and
learned
Wrong verb form
learn
show examples
finanical
Correct your spelling
financial
skills.It is
benficial
Correct your spelling
beneficial
for
those
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
future.

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Task Achievement
To improve your task achievement, ensure you fully address all parts of the task. Provide a more balanced view and develop your arguments effectively with specific examples. Also, make sure that your position on the topic is clear throughout the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion
Work on developing a more logical structure for your essay. This involves having a clear progression of ideas, improved paragraphing, and appropriate use of cohesive devices.
Task Achievement
Support your main points with specific examples and details to strengthen your arguments. Examples should be relevant and clearly linked to the points you are making.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • financial literacy
  • budgeting
  • savings culture
  • spending wisely
  • financial stability
  • responsibility
  • discipline
  • financial goals
  • long-term financial health
  • digital transactions
  • online banking
  • interest rates
  • investments
  • credit scores
  • debt management
  • academic pressures
  • curriculum balance
  • informed financial decisions
What to do next:
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