Write about the following topic: Some people say that the amount of noise that people make should be strictly controlled. Others say that people should be free to make as much noise as they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
With the increasing
of
world population, more particularly in certain countries, many Change preposition
apply
people
claim that it is becoming more noisy than before. It is true that young pupils love to enjoy times
, listen to music loudly, celebrate and Fix the agreement mistake
time
do
fun Verb problem
have
togrther
that makes Correct your spelling
together
noise
. It becomes more loud particularly
during the night period. Many residents demand that there should be Add the comma(s)
, particularly
restriction
on Fix the agreement mistake
restrictions
noise
pollution
, while
some oppose this
idea considering that people
should have freedom
on
what they do. I strongly support the idea of restricting Change preposition
in
noise
pollution
. The reasons behind my support will be outlined in the below paragraphs.
Noise
pollution
is one of the three main environmental pollution
. It has enormous negative consequences. To begin
with, there are many elderly citizens, sick
and vulnerable groups in the community. Loud sounds disturb the silence and make the sleeping Correct word choice
and sick
difficut
. Correct your spelling
difficult
Thus
keeping the vulnerable people
in a more unhealthy environment. Moreover
, it is scientifically proved
that Correct your spelling
proven
the
Correct article usage
apply
noise
increases the
blood pressure, which can push Correct article usage
apply
the
cardiovascular patients to Correct article usage
apply
a
Correct article usage
apply
life threatening
conditions. Add a hyphen
life-threatening
Additionally
, many office gowers
prefer to do Correct your spelling
growers
home work
nowadays. Their concentration might be interrupted Correct your spelling
homework
due to
noise
in the surroundings. As a result
, they may face challenges in completing their task smoothly. To add up with the above, loudiness
in Correct your spelling
cloudiness
loudness
the
society creates unfavourable Correct article usage
apply
situation
for students who aspire for higher grades in Fix the agreement mistake
situations
the
school exams.
Correct article usage
apply
However
, many people
believe that everyone should have their freedom
and own choices of what they want to do. Thus
, if anyone wants to do certain activities for their own joy, even it
creates Correct word choice
if it
noise
, others should resepct
their Correct your spelling
respect
freedom
. Nevertheless
, personal freedom
cannot be justified if it causes bad
impact on Correct article usage
a bad
others
Change noun form
others'
other's
wellbeing
.
Correct your spelling
well-being
To conclude
, there are numerous downsides of the noise
creation that owtweigh
the happiness Correct your spelling
outweigh
outweighs
by
creating noisy activities. Community should take certain steps to control the Change preposition
of
noise
in the soceity
. Correct your spelling
society
For instance
, creating awareness amoung
the young generations. Making some rules to punish those who intentionally create Correct your spelling
among
noise
, especially during the night time.Submitted by mazidsau on
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task achievement
The essay addresses the task by discussing both views and providing a personal opinion. However, the ideas are not fully developed or extended with specific examples. Arguments could be further highlighted by exploring thoughts more deeply.
task achievement
Ensure a clear introduction and conclusion while maintaining relevance to the topic throughout. Concluding statements should leave no ambiguity about your stance.
coherence cohesion
The essay has an identifiable structure, but ideas could fluently and naturally connect. Make use of a range of cohesive devices to ensure a seamless flow of information.
coherence cohesion
Main points are somewhat supported, yet they could benefit from a richer variety of supporting details, such as data, anecdotes or expert opinions.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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