IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people believe that students should begin learning a language very early in schoop while others think these subjects should be taught later. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #students #language #schoop #subjects
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Language
Use synonyms
 is a tool for
people
Use synonyms
 doing communicate with each other,
moreover
Linking Words
, it is an integral part of human life.
While
Linking Words
 some
people
Use synonyms
 think that
students
Use synonyms
 can be taught a
language
Use synonyms
 later, I am with those who argue that learning a
language
Use synonyms
 should conveyed to the
students
Use synonyms
 at an early age in their school. First and foremost,
language
Use synonyms
 especially the local
language
Use synonyms
 plays a major role in terms of
communication
Use synonyms
 because with
language
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
 can convey what they want to convey.
Students
Use synonyms
 who have an issue in
communication
Use synonyms
 tend to interact with their friends with difficulty.
This
Linking Words
 issue would lead to bad effects on
students
Use synonyms
 in terms of their mental health as they might be feeling stressed.
Also
Linking Words
,
language
Use synonyms
 helps
students
Use synonyms
 accelerate their learning process
due to
Linking Words
 the materials in books must be provided in a certain
language
Use synonyms
. Another point of view
that is
Linking Words
also
Linking Words
 important is preventing
students
Use synonyms
 from learning a
language
Use synonyms
 very early could combat their success not only in education but
also
Linking Words
 in careers.
Students
Use synonyms
 who have good
communication
Use synonyms
 tend to be successful
people
Use synonyms
 because they can convey their desires or ideas to employers
for instance
Linking Words
.
This
Linking Words
 skill will ease the job and finish it easier,
moreover
Linking Words
, employees with good
communication
Use synonyms
 tend to gain a lucrative job.
Then
Linking Words
, one of the most important things for
people
Use synonyms
 to acquire good
communication
Use synonyms
 is learning a
language
Use synonyms
 very early because they have an opportunity to practice their
language
Use synonyms
 more and more.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 learning a
language
Use synonyms
 at an early age plays a significant role not only in the student's educational success but
also
Linking Words
 in their careers, teachers should
also
Linking Words
 be aware of the mental stage of
students
Use synonyms
 because the difference in ages has the different methods.
Students
Use synonyms
 should be taught the
language
Use synonyms
 proper materials based on their ages.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
The essay approaches the topic appropriately but does not entirely deliver a balanced argument that covers all aspects of the given task, particularly regarding the view that languages should be taught later. A more clear and explicit personal opinion is needed. To improve, ensure that both views are discussed equally and a clear personal stance is presented and justified.
coherence cohesion
While there is a usable structure, the essay requires improvement in cohesion. Logical connectors and a clear progression of ideas are necessary for higher coherence. Sentences should be purposefully arranged to enhance the flow of information. Also, the introduction and conclusion can be more explicitly stated and more reflective of the essay content.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: