IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

In some places, young people find it difficult to communicate with older people. Why is this? What are the solutions? .

#places #people
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As the living style has changed, it affects the way that young
people
 communicate with
olderly
Correct your spelling
elderly
older
. There are three main reasons why it is hard for
children
 to contact with older
people
. First of all,
children
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
few
chance
Change to a plural noun
chances
show examples
 to meet older
people
. Nowadays, the family
becomes
Verb problem
is
show examples
 smaller than
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 past.
Couple
Fix the agreement mistake
Couples
show examples
 do not stay with
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
their parents, so their
children
 do not have a chance to contact
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their
grand parents
Correct your spelling
grandparents
show examples
. So, they do not know how to talk or how to communicate with the
elders
.
As a result
, they become
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
not
familia
Correct your spelling
familiar
 and do not have communication skills when they have to communicate with the
elders
.
Second,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
older
people
 and young
people
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
different
Change the article
a different
show examples
 kind of interest. So, it is not easy for
children
 to talk with the
elders
 because they do not know
topics
Correct article usage
the topics
show examples
 to talk
.
Change preposition
about.
show examples
 It makes their
converstation
Correct your spelling
conversation
 become
silence
Replace the word
silent
show examples
.
Third,
they have different life
experience
Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
show examples
. It makes them do not understand to each other. Sometimes, the
elders
 disagree
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 what the younger
people
 do or think and they ask the
children
stop
Fix the infinitive
to stop
show examples
 doing it, but
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
children
 do not obey.
Then
 they argue
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
 each other. The best solution is that the
elder
Replace the word
elderly
show examples
 and
children
 should open their
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
show examples
 and listen to each other.
Submitted by writersdiary101 on

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introduction conclusion
Ensure that your introduction sets the context for your essay adequately. You should introduce your main points before delving into them.
coherence cohesion
Practice developing a logical flow for your essay by using a variety of linking words and phrases to better connect your ideas and paragraphs.
supported main points
Always support your points with relevant and specific examples that are well-explained, contributing to a richer and more persuasive essay.
clear comprehensive ideas
Aim to address the prompt fully and comprehensively. Touch on all parts of the prompt and develop each of them with balance and detail to enhance clarity.
introduction conclusion
Finish your essay with a conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your position, providing closure to the reader.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological proficiency
  • communication gap
  • digital tools
  • worldviews
  • common ground
  • contemporary slang
  • informal language
  • misunderstandings
  • social hierarchy
  • cultural norms
  • stereotypes
  • prejudices
  • open communication
  • out of touch
  • inexperienced
  • effective communication
  • intergenerational programs
  • cross-generational activities
  • mutual respect
  • active listening
What to do next:
Look at other essays: