Some people feel that it is necessary to test new medicines on animals, while other people feel that this is not fair on animals and not necessary. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #test #medicines #animals

There is an ongoing debate regarding drugs being tested on

animals

for medical experiments.

While

some people argue that it is beneficial because of

biological

Correct article usage

the biological

show examples

similarity between humans and

animals

, others claim that

such

testings

Replace the word

tests

show examples

are against ethical values. I believe that

such

methods are needed to identify the potential symptoms and prevent the

dreadly

Correct your spelling

deadly

dreaded

dread

diseases.

This

essay will discuss both views and my opinion in detail with relevant examples. On the one hand, it has been proven to be significant because many scientists have found medicines for critical diseases by testing on different species.

That is

to say that some

animals

for example

, mice

Change the verb form

are

show examples

susceptible to similar health issues as humans

such

as cancer, heart disease, and blood sugar.

Therefore

, trailing new drugs on mice helps researchers

Verb problem

apply

show examples

learn about the exact symptoms and the effectiveness of

such

medicine in curing the disease.

Moreover

, alternative methods are not considered promising because of the inability to replicate biological relationships with those artificial procedures.

For instance

, the treatment for diabetes was discovered by the experimentation of chemical compositions on mice which

lead

Wrong verb form

led

show examples

to the discovery of insulin.

On the other hand

, many people argue that

such

research should involve alternative procedures.

In other words

, those folks argue that we do not have

Correct article usage

the rights

show examples

rights

Fix the agreement mistake

right

show examples

to kill or cause suffering to those species because it is illegal and unethical.

However

, there is no other method proven to be successful or considered effective than animal

testings

Fix the agreement mistake

testing

show examples

Furthermore

, they believe that

such

lives should

also

be respected same as the livelihood of people.

For example

, in India,

Correct article usage

the blue

show examples

blue cross

Correct your spelling

Blue Cross

show examples

commitee

Correct your spelling

committee

appealed to the government against the medical department to restrain from suffering

animals

but the case was declined and stated that it was performed to improve the

longitivity

Correct your spelling

longevity

of human life. In conclusion,

although

there are opinions against animal

testings

Fix the agreement mistake

testing

show examples

, I believe that it is beneficial in identifying the signs and finding the right treatments as we do not have any other procedures to rely on even though there have been many successful technological advancements in the medical industry.

Submitted by jeeanay on Wed Dec 06 2023

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Task Achievement

To improve Task Achievement in your essay, ensure that you fully respond to all parts of the task. Though your essay touches on both views and provides an opinion, the development of each view and the explanation of your opinion could be more nuanced and detailed, providing a balanced discussion that demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic. Additionally, providing more targeted and specific examples would strengthen your arguments and enhance relevance.

Coherence & Cohesion

For Coherence and Cohesion, while your essay presents a logical structure that is easy to follow, and your introduction and conclusion are present, you should work on enhancing the connection between ideas. Use a wider range of cohesive devices and vary your sentence structures to ensure that the progression of ideas within and across paragraphs is more smooth and natural. Supporting main points should relate closely to the topic of the paragraph and must be elaborated further for a thorough understanding.

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14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

345 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people feel that it is necessary to test new medicines on animals, while other people feel that this is not fair on animals and not necessary. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both of these views and give your own opinion.

83.The movement of people from agricultural areas to cities to work can cause serious problems in both places. What are the serious problems? What measures can be used to solve these problems?

In many countries, there is shortage of housing due to growing population. Some people argue that new towns should be built in the country side, others argue for the regeneration of cities. What are the advantages and disadvantages of building new towns in the country?

People are now living much longer lives than before and many feel we should remain in the workforce for longer. To what extent do you agree or disagree?