Most young people without a partner would prefer to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. Yet being in a relationship when you are young is not always a good idea. As part of a class project, write about whether you agree or disagree. Give reasons for your choices.
Nowadays, there are numerous young people who
wants
to have a boyfriend and a girlfriend. Change the verb form
want
However
, being in a relationship
is not always a good choice. As such
, there are merits and demerits to this
idea, although
I opine that its demerits outweigh the merits. I completely disagree to
Change preposition
with
this
idea, because having relationship
Correct article usage
a relationship
in
Change preposition
at
such
of young age will bring numerous demerits on
Change preposition
to
children
Change noun form
children's
life
. They will not focus on their study.
There are several reasons to disagree with Fix the agreement mistake
lives
this
idea. The predominant one is that children might not emotionally
mature Add a missing verb
be emotionally
to
handle the complexities of a Rephrase
enough to
relationship
, and it can build numerous problems in the future. For example
, they get distracting
Wrong verb form
distracted
on
their study easily when they get disputing with their partner. Even though, being in Change preposition
in
relationship
means there is a person who Add an article
a relationship
support
us especially when we have issues. Change the verb form
supports
However
, having Correct article usage
a relatioship
relatioship
Correct your spelling
relationship
relationships
in
Change preposition
at
such
young
age will bring a lot Correct article usage
a young
disaster
because of immaturity.
Change preposition
of disaster
In addition
, young people can concentrate on discovering their interests and building their character as a
individual until they are mature enough to start a Change the article
an
relationship
. If they are already mature enough as emotional to start a relationship
, they would respect each other personal space in the relationship
and help each other to grow better.
In conclusion, Pursuing dream
and upgrading their skill are the most important. Having a boyfriend or a girlfriend Fix the agreement mistake
dreams
in
Change preposition
at
such
young
age can give numerous obstacles for their future, especially if they cannot manage it well. In my opinion, Correct article usage
a young
focusing
on their future, and if they already Change preposition
by focusing
prepare
themselves on their emotional aspect, they can start a Wrong verb form
prepared
relationship
.Submitted by gladysdharmawan1994 on
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task achievement
Your essay did not fully develop the points raised about young relationships. It is essential to elaborate on each point and offer specific examples to reinforce the argument. Avoid making general statements that do not thoroughly answer the essay prompt.
coherence and cohesion
While your essay did contain an introduction and a conclusion, they lacked depth and clarity. The introduction should more clearly present your thesis, and the conclusion should effectively summarize the points made in the essay. Moreover, maintaining a consistent tone throughout the essay will benefit its overall quality.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
