IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The table below describes water usage for 3 different purposes in 6 countries in 2003.

The table below describes water usage for 3 different purposes in 6 countries in 2003.
The table above indicates the
water
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usage
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 percentage within six countries from four different continents in 2003, which are Canada, United Kingdom, China,
Australia
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, India and Japan. The consumption of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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water
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were
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was
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 divided into three categories : Domestic, Industrial and Agricultural. The data shows that the countries that used the
water
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 mostly for Agricultural needs were the United Kingdom with 90%, China with 87%, India with 82% and Japan with 66%.
Linking Words
While their
Correct word choice
Their
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 second
water
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usage
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were
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was
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 for Domestic and Industrial needs, averaging
in
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apply
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less than 20% of
usage
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Australia
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 and
Australia
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 were using most of their
water
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 Domestic needs, with 65% and 63% respectively.
While
Linking Words
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Australia
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Australia's
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 second
water
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 consumption
were
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was
show examples
 for Agricultural needs
and
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apply
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averaging
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
 33%, Canada
were
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was
show examples
 using
the
Correct article usage
apply
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water
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 for Industrial needs as their second priority,
on
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at
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 32%. In general, most of the countries
that
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apply
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shown
on
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in
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 the table were using their
water
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 for Agricultural needs, followed by Domestic
usage
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 and Industrial
usage
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 as the lowest
usage
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 rate.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, usage, australia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "table" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • water consumption
  • domestic usage
  • industrial usage
  • agricultural usage
  • cubic meters
  • per capita
  • water-intensive industries
  • sustainable water management
  • irrigation practices
  • efficient water use
  • developed vs developing nations
  • water scarcity
  • desalination
  • water footprint
  • resource allocation
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