As the result of tourisms and the incresing number of people traveling, there's an growingh demand for more flights. What problems does it have on the enviroment? What measures could be taken to solve the problem?
Nowadays, tourism is becoming increasingly popular and is in great demand among people for more varied flights to anywhere in the world. From there it follows that a large number of flights can harm the environment. consumes more combustible gas than them.
This
essay will discuss the main problems associated with this
topic and propose some possible solutions to avoid them.
The main problems
caused by aeroplanes Fix the agreement mistake
problem
are
increased Correct subject-verb agreement
is
carbon
dioxide emission due to
greater aviation of
fuel consumption. Because an aeroplane is two to three times bigger than regular vehicles Change preposition
apply
such
as a car,or a busCorrect word choice
and
For example
, the amount of carbon
ejection depends on plane size, distance and capacity but despite this
usually 133g of CO2 emissions per passenger per km. Moreover
, by virtue of huge requests airport needs to be expanded. Therefore
, during the expansion of the airport building, trees will be demolished and waste will be thrown out, which will have a detrimental effect on the environment.
One of the best solutions to these problems are
to develop and promote the use of sustainable aviation fuels. Old fuel can be replaced derived from renewable sources to reduce the Change the verb form
is
carbon
footprint of air travel. Also
, implement effective land use planning to minimize the environmental impact of expanded emissions and protect natural habitats.
In conclusion, to reduce carbon
ejection need to substitute fuel creation to bio-degradable substances. Additionally
, realize a new plan for the use of land to create airfields and decrease pollution. Such
measures will improve flights around the world and damage nature less.Submitted by alima.arapova05 on
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coherence cohesion
You have attempted to organize your essay with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the logical structure could be improved by ensuring that each paragraph clearly presents one main idea or argument, and that these are developed coherently throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
The presence of the introduction and conclusion is noticeable, but both could be more effectively executed by stating your main point more directly in the introduction, and reinforcing it clearly in the conclusion. A direct thesis statement and a recap of your arguments in the conclusion would improve the overall structure of your writing.
coherence cohesion
You have included some main points, but they need to be more fully developed. Expand on the issues with more detailed explanations, and strengthen your arguments by discussing implications or providing more in-depth analysis. Aim for greater depth in your discussion to convey a stronger argument.
task achievement
Your response addresses the task and you have attempted to provide a clear, comprehensive response, but there could be more development of your ideas, with stronger topic sentences and more elaboration to firmly establish each point. Strive to address all parts of the task with more detail and precision.
task achievement
Your ideas are relevant to the topic, but they could be expanded for greater clarity and insight. Delve deeper into the subject by providing a more thorough explanation of your points, and by linking them back to the question more explicitly to show that you are fully addressing the task.
task achievement
You've used a general example regarding CO2 emissions per passenger per km, which is a good start, but you could improve by including more specific, detailed examples. Examples help to illustrate your points and make your argument more convincing. Research some real-world instances or data to make your examples stronger and more pertinent to the topic.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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