Its important for people to take risks, in both their professional lives and personnal lives. Do the advantage of taking these risks outweigh the disadvantage?
Some people believe it is advantageous to take
risk
in their working Fix the agreement mistake
risks
condition
and private Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
life
. While
, other argue with this
statement and I believe it is advantageous to take risk
owing to numerous pros like career Fix the agreement mistake
risks
growth
and potential. However
, in this
essay
we will discuss both Add a comma
essay,
pros
and cons of taking Correct article usage
the pros
risk
in Fix the agreement mistake
risks
owns
Wrong verb form
own
life
.
On the positive side, taking risk
helps in exponential growth
in career
, if a Correct article usage
a career
person
take
more Change the verb form
takes
risk
in early
stage of Add an article
the early
an early
career
Correct pronoun usage
their career
his career
her career
then
not only he will be getting numerous experience in his life
but also
it will lead to extensive learning, which will further
leads
to substantial Change the verb form
lead
growth
in later
part of Add an article
the later
life
. Another advantage is, person
will unlock his true potential. Add an article
a person
the person
While
taking Add an article
a risk
the risk
risk
, Fix the agreement mistake
risks
person
will go through extreme Add an article
a person
the person
struggle
which Fix the agreement mistake
struggles
test
the limits and post Change the verb form
tests
successful
coming out of Replace the word
success
this
phase, there will be significant chances of outperforming from
other Change preposition
apply
non-
Add a hyphen
non-risk-taking
risk
taking people. For instance
, as per leading
Correct article usage
a leading
job
portal of western
Capitalize word
Western
country
, Fix the agreement mistake
countries
its
been observed that Correct your spelling
it has
due to
risk taking
tendency, youngsters are earning fifty percent more annual income as Add a hyphen
risk-taking
compare
to Wrong verb form
compared
Correct article usage
the pervious
pervious
generation.
Correct your spelling
previous
On the other hand
, taking risk
might Fix the agreement mistake
risks
effect
the mental health of an individual. Without proper planning and analyzing the impact, if a Correct your spelling
affect
person
takes risk
in their Fix the agreement mistake
risks
job
then
there is high
probability of failure which will Correct article usage
a high
leads
to numerous other problems like financial burden, Change the verb form
lead
job
loss and other mental health issues like stress, anxiety
. To illustrate, as per Correct word choice
and anxiety
report
published by Add an article
the report
a report
leading
medical institute Add an article
the leading
of
developing Change preposition
in
nation
, Fix the agreement mistake
nations
from
Change preposition
in
past
few years, Correct article usage
the past
Correct article usage
the sale
sale
of anti-depressant medicine have Fix the agreement mistake
sales
sky rocketed
by forty Correct your spelling
skyrocketed
percent
.
In conclusion, I believe by Change the spelling
per cent
proper
brainstorming the impact, a Change the word
properly
person
should take risk
in his Fix the agreement mistake
risks
life
as it will be helpful in getting the true potential and exponential growth
in job
. Add an article
the job
Moreover
it will outweigh the disadvantage of getting Add a comma
Moreover,
negative
impact on mental health.Correct article usage
a negative
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Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay presents clear ideas on the topic, but the logical structure of your arguments could be enhanced with clearer transitions between ideas. Aim to guide the reader with more cohesive linking phrases between sentences and paragraphs to better illustrate the relationship between your points.
Task Achievement
You have addressed the task only partially. Ensure that you provide a more balanced discussion of both sides of the argument, and make sure your conclusion is derived from the points argued within the essay. Develop your ideas further, and attempt to elaborate on your arguments to better fulfill the task requirements.
Your opinion
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If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?