In many countries, children are engaged in some kind of paid work. Some people regard this as completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility.
By
developing countries over the Change preposition
In
last
years
, there Correct quantifier usage
few years
are
different Wrong verb form
have been
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
about
raising a child and many options can be considered. Some Change preposition
regarding
parents
are taking hard to
their Change preposition
on
children
and put
pressure on them to start a job or Wrong verb form
putting
independency
. Replace the word
independence
In
the other hand, there are Change preposition
On
parents
without any idea about their children
’s future. In both type
, working Fix the agreement mistake
types
of
Change preposition
with
children
is critical and important. First
family push Change the article
The first
kids
to Correct article usage
the kids
work
in
small ages and the second support Change preposition
at
for
Correct pronoun usage
them for
long
time. I believe that we should not let Change the article
a long
children
work
because they are not old enough to struggle with life issues. There is only one situation that parents
can allow their children
to work
and that is
preapring
a child for Correct your spelling
preparing
future
by experiencing.
I have no respect for Correct article usage
the future
parents
who insist on working in childhood. They should be happy and experience the world over the years. Not even workplaces are not appropriate for them, but also
in
Change preposition
on
exagerated
Correct your spelling
exaggerated
occation
, there can be a great potential for mental issues and crimes. It is obvious that Correct your spelling
occasion
children
can not handle and understand the relations between people so they will be involved many
misunderstandings.
Another thing that can be Change preposition
in many
harm
Replace the word
harmful
for
society is increasing cultural issues between Change preposition
to
children
who are working without permission. When the kids
are in work
atmosphere, the first thing that affects them is literature. Correct article usage
a work
Unfortunatly
, older people do not pay enough attention to their words and their acts, and it is a reality of workplaces, which can not be ignored. Correct your spelling
Unfortunately
Kids
see them and as they are boss or supervisour
, they try to act like them or at least act the way they like.
Correct your spelling
supervisor
supervisors
In contrast
, some people believe it is a great opportunity to start independency
. I think Replace the word
independence
kids
can work
in different places based on their ages. For example
for a child who is 10 or 11, industrial places such
as rapiar
and fixing cars are not suitable, so they can Correct your spelling
rapier
repair
work
in more
better places Change the word
apply
such
as libraries or book stores
which has Correct your spelling
bookstores
more
comfortable condition for them. Over Add an article
a more
the more
this
kind of workings
, Replace the word
work
parents
should monitor their children
to saty
aware of their mental and Correct your spelling
stay
physiscal
health.
Correct your spelling
physical
Overall
, I think parents
should protect their children
against atmospheres which are harmful for
them like protecting against physical hazards.Change the preposition
to
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task achievement
The essay does provide a contrast between opinions on child labor; however, the extent of exploration and analysis on each view is limited. The candidate's own position seems unclear and the essay as a whole lacks a fully developed argument or conclusion. To improve, ensure to present a balanced discussion of both sides of the argument or clearly state and justify one's own position throughout.
coherence cohesion
The essay shows an attempt to organize ideas but suffers from poor paragraph structure, lack of clear topic sentences, and transitions between points. To enhance coherence and cohesion, start each paragraph with a clear topic sentence, followed by supporting sentences with examples, and finally, a concluding sentence. Use cohesive devices (e.g., furthermore, however, therefore) to better link ideas and paragraphs.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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