Some people like to try new things, for example, places to visit and types of food. Other people prefer to keep doing things they are familiar with. Discuss both these attitudes and give your own opinion.

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Nowadays, many
people
are interested in exploring new
things
such
as travelling to new places,
eating
Correct word choice
and eating
show examples
a variety of cuisines to
experience
new
things
in their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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.
However
, some
people
feel that doing activities that involve repetitions
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
more calming and comfortable for them. In
this
essay, I will try to examine these two behaviours. On the one hand, exploring new
things
they have never done before is a unique
experience
for everyone because it lets you go out of your comfort zone.
Additionally
,
people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
are enthusiastic about searching for new
experience
Fix the agreement mistake
experiences
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will have a greater will to adapt to new
things
.
For example
,
people
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
have a habit of doing actions that they never have done before
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
a higher chance of surviving in conditions they have never felt before because of their past
experience
navigating through a difficult time.
Thus
, I believe individuals
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
are brave enough to step out of their comfort zone are going to better manage hard conditions.
On the other hand
,
people
who have a habit of repetition are more kin of their work as they are more comfortable doing it.
This
is the result of constant exposure to a certain activity or muscle memory that has been exposed to them.
As a result
,
this
type of individual has formed a habit so they have a harder time changing their everyday movement.
For example
, someone who has formed an addiction to something needs therapy to
to
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
get them healed from their addiction
such
as gambling or playing games.
Hence
,
things
that are familiar to them could give them more happiness and joy. In conclusion, there are two types of
people
the one that likes to do new
things
and the other one who enjoys the usual
things
.
Submitted by jedidia.husodo on

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coherence cohesion
While your essay presents the basic structure of an Introduction, Main Body, and Conclusion, which is good, it would benefit from clearer transition phrases between ideas and paragraphs. This will improve the logical flow and make your arguments easier to follow.
coherence cohesion
Introduce each paragraph with a clear topic sentence, which outlines the main idea of the paragraph, followed by supporting sentences that develop this idea in more detail.
task achievement
You have addressed the topic, which is positive, and presented a conclusion that reflects your opinion. However, ensure that your opinion is also clearly stated in the introduction and that all parts of the prompt have been fully answered to achieve a higher score.
task achievement
Expand on your ideas by offering more in-depth analysis and by including a greater range of relevant examples. Your examples should be detailed and precisely aligned with the argument you are presenting.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Novelty
  • Routine
  • Comfort zone
  • Risk-taker
  • Risk-averse
  • Enrichment
  • Personal growth
  • Innovation
  • Creativity
  • Stability
  • Tradition
  • Habit
  • Familiarity
  • Personal enrichment
  • Life stages
  • Fulfilling
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