today ,most of people get married and give birth in their thirties rather than when they are younger.is it a positive or negtaive development in your opinion?to what extent do you support the devlopment?

#people #birth #thirties #negtaive #development #support #devlopment

Nowadays,

instead

of early wedding by a large group of

people

like to marry at their thirty age.

However

, it is reckoned by some pupils are not ready for wedding.

Therefore

, marriage is postponed by these

people

. There are negative effects on

people

's fear of loneliness and need

support

Change preposition

for support

show examples

. It is partly true, that late marriage has now become a trend which creates

problems

mentally and emotionally.

This

essay will elaborate

further

in the upcoming paragraphs. In the modern era, the younger generation is getting their wedding late

due to

difficulty in finding the right

partner

so they avoid marrying early. So late marriages are being affected by pupils. They think too much all the time and feel lonely. It creates

problems

mentally and physically. To illustrate, in my city young

people

are getting late weddings which causes complications in their lives they become smokers and drug intakes.

Hence

, health issues are generated

Change preposition

show examples

lung

problems

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and cardiovascular.

Furthermore

, they are

also

emotionally disturbed by their situation.

In addition

, many youngsters need support from their

family

Fix the agreement mistake

families

show examples

to succeed in their fields. If you have

such

partner

who really supports you

then

you can achieve anything.

Moreover

, you can share all the hardships together and solve them. Without a lifetime

partner

, you may lose confidence in your life.

Consequently

, you have lost hope of a new life. In a nutshell, early marriage has numerous benefits ,

for instance

, companionship, emotional strength and happiness.

Although

young

people

avoid getting married before thirty it has disadvantages. They suffer from illness and emotional

disturb

Replace the word

disturbance

show examples

. In my opinion, youngsters should get married before thirty to avoid mental

problems

and be happy with a new life

partner

Submitted by mobinadurrani43 on Fri Dec 08 2023

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Task Achievement

For Task Achievement, ensure that you address all parts of the prompt in a balanced manner. Your essay should provide a clear opinion on the positive or negative development of the trend toward later marriage and should to some extent reflect on the level of support you have for this development. Extend your arguments with relevant examples and make clear, fully developed points.

Coherence and Cohesion

Regarding Coherence and Cohesion, the structure of your essay should exhibit a clear and logical flow of ideas, with well-organized paragraphs that each focus on a single main point. Use cohesive devices appropriately to connect ideas and paragraphs. Make sure that your introduction and conclusion are clearly identified, and that your introduction includes a thesis statement while your conclusion effectively summarizes your main points and restates your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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16Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

282 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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today ,most of people get married and give birth in their thirties rather than when they are younger.is it a positive or negtaive development in your opinion?to what extent do you support the devlopment?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The internet has made knowledge immediately available through computers and smartphones all over the world. Much of the information is free. Discuss the both advantages and drawbacks of this trend.

Topic – Some people believe that educational success depends on good teachers, while others believe that students’ attitude are important. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

Researches shows that business meetings, discussions and training are happening online nowadays. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

universities should accept equal numbers of male and female students in every subject. To what eztent do you agree or disagree?

Aircraft have been increasingly used to transport fruits and vegetables to some countries where such plants hardly grow or are out of season. Some people consider it a good trend, but some people oppose it. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.