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Band 5.5

The tables below show data about the amount of television watched by children in different countries (hours per day) and also the average academic achievement of people in these countries (% of people completing each level). Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below, and make comparisons where relevant.

The tables below show data about the amount of television watched by children in different countries (hours per day) and also the average academic achievement of people in these countries (% of people completing each level). Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below, and make comparisons where relevant.
#tables #show #data #amount #television #children #countries #hours #achievement #people #level #report #university #lecturer #information #comparisons
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Given are two graphs concerning children in different countries.
While
Linking Words
 the former reveals the amount of time spent on television, measured in
Add an article
an hour
show examples
hour
Fix the agreement mistake
hours
show examples
 per day, the latter provides the data
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 academic achievement on average, counted in
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
.
Overall
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
,
Canada
Use synonyms
 and The
UK
Use synonyms
 are
three
Use synonyms
 countries which have the highest
hours
Correct quantifier usage
number of hours
show examples
 squandered on television by
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
kids,
as well as
Linking Words
 account for the most remarkable proportions of the number of
people
Use synonyms
 who completed schooling. In terms of the number of hours watched by adolescents, the first rank is taken up by the data of
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
,
Canada
Use synonyms
 and The
Use synonyms
Uk
Correct your spelling
UK
show examples
 with 4, narrowly followed by those of China and Italy with 3. The
remainings
Correct your spelling
remaining
show examples
 namely the
figure
Fix the agreement mistake
figures
show examples
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 India, Brazil, UAE and
Malta
Use synonyms
 in the range of 1 and 2, which takes up the most insignificant proportions. Regarding average educational accomplishment, there are
three
Use synonyms
 types of academic ranges
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
school, high school and diversity. With respect to the information
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Italy,
Canada
Use synonyms
 and
Malta
Use synonyms
 are
three
Use synonyms
 nations where there are not any
people
Use synonyms
 dropping out of institutions, followed closely by the
USA
Use synonyms
, the
UK
Use synonyms
, UAE, China and Brazil which are in the 90’s. Meanwhile, India is the country having the
number
Correct word choice
highest number
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
 not completing their learning journeys. As for the data
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 high
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
,
Malta
Use synonyms
 is the only nation which maintains their crown with 100. At the opposite end of the scale, India’s and China’s dwellers have the lowest
figure
Fix the agreement mistake
figures
show examples
 with 68 and 60 respectively.
Whereas
Linking Words
, the others constituted in the range of 80 to 97. As for
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
universities, the
UK
Use synonyms
 and
Canada
Use synonyms
 are the two which have
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 breakdown higher than 30, to be specific to be 29 and 32 respectively. The figure of
people
Use synonyms
 accomplishing college in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 nations namely
Use synonyms
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
, Italy, China and Brazil is in the
20’s
Change noun form
20s
show examples
. In
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
stark contrast, UAE,
Malta
Use synonyms
 and India are
Use synonyms
three
Correct article usage
the three
show examples
 countries which have the least noticeable
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
show examples
.
Submitted by hominhtrang995 on

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words usa, canada, uk, three, people, malta with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "data" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 2 times.
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