Some people say that playing computergames is bad for children in every aspect. Ohters say that palying computergames can have positive effects on the way children develop. Discuss both views and give youre opinion.

#people #computergames #children #aspect #ohters #effects #youre

Some people say that computer

games

can have bad effects on

children

On the other hand

, others say that playing

video

games

can affect positively

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the way

children

develop . A discussion of these ideas is presented in

this

essay.

Then

, there is my agreement with the second statement as well.

Firstly

, there are some arguments that playing

video

games

children

under a suitable age can cause major problems for them as they grow up.

For example

, there are some game centres where

children

there

Rephrase

apply

show examples

and play shooting

games

contain

Wrong verb form

containing

show examples

raging scenes mixing with blood and dead bodies.

Therefore

This

leads to some mental health problems for the

children

. So , parents should be more considerate about what their kids playing.

Secondly

, There are some thoughts that playing computer

games

can lead the young age generation to a good way of development. It can happen if they play educational

games

For instance

, some

games

have been created which are very helpful in learning English by doing different funny tasks .

This

can help the process of learning English for kids.

Thus

video

games

Also

can cause positive development in younger individuals.

To conclude

,In my opinion as a parent or school teacher, you can solve types of

video

games

that are created for educational purposes and help them learn by playing and enjoying.

Hence

, playing computer

games

could be effective on the positive side.

Submitted by amirrezadelghandi3 on Sat Dec 09 2023

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task achievement

The essay addresses the prompt, but the development of ideas is limited. Arguments are not fully expanded and lack depth. Each paragraph needs clear topic sentences and fully developed supporting ideas.

coherence cohesion

The essay has an adequate structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, transitions between ideas could be smoother, and the overall essay requires better organization to enhance coherence.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

242 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

addiction
physical activity
violent content
cognitive skills
problem-solving
strategic thinking
hand-eye coordination
educational games
interactive learning
teamwork
collaboration
communication skills
academic performance
stress relief
mental health
parental guidance
moderation

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Some people say that playing computergames is bad for children in every aspect. Ohters say that palying computergames can have positive effects on the way children develop. Discuss both views and give youre opinion.

Word Count

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In numerous nations, there is a growing trend for individuals to frequently discuss financial matters, such as their earnings or expenditures, in everyday conversation. What are the reasons behind this phenomenon?

In many countries children are engaged in some kinf of paid work. Some people regard this a completely wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

some people believe that the increasing use of computers and mobile phones for communication has ha a negative effect on young people's reading and writing skills.to what extent do you agree or disagree?