Some people say that playing computergames is bad for children in every aspect. Ohters say that palying computergames can have positive effects on the way children develop. Discuss both views and give youre opinion.

Some people say that computer
games
can have bad effects on
children
.
On the other hand
, others say that playing
video
games
can affect positively
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the way
children
develop . A discussion of these ideas is presented in
this
in
this
essay.
Then
, there is my agreement with the second statement as well.
Firstly
, there are some arguments that playing
video
games
by
children
under a suitable age can cause major problems for them as they grow up.
For example
, there are some game centres where
children
go
there
Rephrase
apply
show examples
and play shooting
games
contain
Wrong verb form
containing
show examples
raging scenes mixing with blood and dead bodies.
Therefore
,
This
leads to some mental health problems for the
children
. So , parents should be more considerate about what their kids playing.
Secondly
, There are some thoughts that playing computer
games
can lead the young age generation to a good way of development. It can happen if they play educational
games
.
For instance
, some
games
have been created which are very helpful in learning English by doing different funny tasks .
This
can help the process of learning English for kids.
Thus
,
video
games
Also
can cause positive development in younger individuals.
To conclude
,In my opinion as a parent or school teacher, you can solve types of
video
games
that are created for educational purposes and help them learn by playing and enjoying.
Hence
, playing computer
games
could be effective on the positive side.
Submitted by amirrezadelghandi3 on

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task achievement
The essay addresses the prompt, but the development of ideas is limited. Arguments are not fully expanded and lack depth. Each paragraph needs clear topic sentences and fully developed supporting ideas.
coherence cohesion
The essay has an adequate structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, transitions between ideas could be smoother, and the overall essay requires better organization to enhance coherence.

Word Count

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A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • addiction
  • physical activity
  • violent content
  • cognitive skills
  • problem-solving
  • strategic thinking
  • hand-eye coordination
  • educational games
  • interactive learning
  • teamwork
  • collaboration
  • communication skills
  • academic performance
  • stress relief
  • mental health
  • parental guidance
  • moderation
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