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Band 7

Some people think that a job provides not only an income but also a social life. Other people think that it is better to develop a social life with people you do not work with. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #job #income #life #work
Work
 is a major part of our lives. On average, we spend around half a century at
work
,
therefore
, it is unsurprising that some individuals socialise with colleagues. Some disapprove of
this
, and, admittedly, there are valid reasons for
this
;
nevertheless
, there are benefits of spending time together outside of working hours. Mixing your
work
 and social life could be risky for several reasons.
Firstly
, the relationship between managers and staff might become difficult to manage.
For example
, I had a good rapport with a former manager and we frequently met up after
work
;
however
, when there was an issue at
work
, he found it difficult to deal with because of our close friendship.
In addition
, when you get
together with
 your colleagues, you tend to talk about
work
 and
this
 might not be good for your mental health, as you need to switch off.
Finally
, you need to be careful how you behave because if a video of inappropriate behaviour
was
Wrong verb form
is
show examples
 posted on social media, it could be detrimental to your career. Despite these drawbacks, spending time with fellow employees can be advantageous.
Firstly
, teamwork can improve, as there is good communication between staff members and we tend to co-operate better with people we get on well with.
Furthermore
, if you are contented at
work
, you are likely to be less stressed.
Moreover
, in contemporary society, it is particularly difficult to make friends, as everyone is leading
such
 busy lives,
therefore
, making friends with co-workers could prevent loneliness. There are certainly risks involved with socialising with fellow workers, and,
for
this
 reason, everyone needs to behave appropriately. Despite
this
, I feel that if everyone acts professionally whilst in the workplace, and has enjoyable interactions outside of it, there should not be an issue.
Submitted by waauliya011 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure each main body paragraph is focused on a single idea, with clear topic sentences guiding the reader through your argument.
coherence cohesion
Utilize a range of cohesive devices to create a seamless flow of ideas, but avoid overuse or mechanical repetition.
task achievement
Give balanced attention to both views presented in the essay prompt and ensure your opinion is clear and substantiated.
task achievement
Integrate deeper, more detailed examples to support your points for a fully developed argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on concluding paragraphs by summarizing the key points and reaffirming your position in a synthesizing manner.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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