Computers are often argued to be the most important invention of the last hundred years. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
During recent centuries, humankind has invented lots of things , accompanied by or
due to
the rapid progress of science and technology, such
as cars, planes, medicine to cure cancers and various equipment used in factories. These have brought dramatic changes to our daily lives. People may have different ideas when arguing about which is the most important one, but as for me, I should claim that computers
outweigh all others in their importance to us. Should computers
not come into reality, it is extremely hard to imagine what today's world will be.
First and foremost, Computers
,
Remove the comma
apply
is
been widely used in nearly every field of our modern society. For individuals, it is used for learning or entertainment. For companies, Verb problem
have
computers
are essential equipment to communicate messages,
and store commercial documents. For factories, logistics Remove the comma
apply
arrangement
and production monitoring are Fix the agreement mistake
arrangements
also
heavily dependent on them. Even governments are improving their service level and providing convenience by utilising the capabilities of these machines.
However
, they are not simply machines. Another manifest factor to verdict its importance lies in that they are evolving into intelligent machines, namely AI. AI is not a collection of cold chips or disks, it is a super-man, it can think, it can answer your questions and it is now providing a deeper and better understanding and solutions to the common problems humans might be less efficient or even has
no chance to resolve.
That said, I could not think of any other Correct subject-verb agreement
have
similarly
significant man-made instruments which could replace computers
. The computers
, instead
, are exploring more areas than before with a more profound methodology, in the years to come, we might be astounded at the stunning fruits resulting from its progress.Submitted by davidyangjc on
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task achievement
Your essay somewhat addresses the prompt, but it does not fully explore the extent to which the computer is seen as the most important invention. Expanding on comparisons with other inventions would strengthen the argument.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader. Use clear topic sentences to indicate to the reader what the paragraph will discuss.
task achievement
You should provide more specific examples to support your points. General statements are insufficient; grounding your argument in concrete details would improve your score.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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