many people think that to become a successful specialist, it is better to choose a career early in life and never change it later. Do you agree or disagree?

Our brain might not
design
Wrong verb form
be designed
show examples
to learn about all of
Add an article
the knowledges
show examples
knowledges
Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
show examples
in the world.
Although
someone
has
Correct pronoun usage
who has
show examples
a high IQ test will
mastery
Replace the word
master
show examples
more than one subject,
that is
better if you have
plan
Correct article usage
a plan
show examples
to select one of them. I believe that
focused
Wrong verb form
focusing
show examples
on a special subject will
has
Wrong verb form
have
show examples
a significant impact
to reduce
Change preposition
on reducing
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
time
and
get
Verb problem
giving
show examples
more
changes
Correct your spelling
chances
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to reach a
success
Replace the word
successful
show examples
life. Our
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
a
limit
Replace the word
limited
show examples
time
,
therefore
the best way
reduced
Change the verb form
to reduce
show examples
a mistake is
make
Fix the infinitive
to make
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a specific goal
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
reach it. Writing the specific field will help us to prepare early and give
more
Correct pronoun usage
us more
show examples
time
than
Correct word choice
before
show examples
we decide
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
later. E.g., If you want to be a musician,
First
Change the article
the First
show examples
step you have to do is select a genre of music
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
you want in
early
Correct article usage
the early
show examples
times. That step will provide
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
much
time
for preparing,
practicing
Change the spelling
practising
show examples
,
evaluating
Correct word choice
and evaluating
show examples
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the genre. Not only
that
Add a missing verb
does that
show examples
save more
time
but
also
increased
Wrong verb form
increases
show examples
Correct article usage
the change
show examples
change
Correct your spelling
chance
show examples
to be
Change preposition
of being
show examples
a successful musician.
Moreover
, If we focus on a genre that will help us
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
manage
time
in
learning
Add an article
the learning
show examples
process.
For example
, we only
focusing
Change the form of the verb
focus
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
a jazz music
Remove the article
jazz music
a piece of jazz music
show examples
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
ignore the others.
As a result
, we know much better about that music jazz than anyone and will impact to a big opportunity
became
Change the verb form
to become
show examples
a great jazz musician. In conclusion,
successful
Correct article usage
a successful
show examples
life is not only about endurance, persistence or motivation but
also
focusing
Change preposition
about focusing
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
a specific area. I believe if we concentrate
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
small
Add an article
a small
the small
show examples
area that will provide
length
Correct article usage
a length
show examples
time
Change preposition
of time
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
get a goal.
In addition
,
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it will create a gigantic possibility for success in that area
Submitted by syah.lian.ju on

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coherence cohesion
Your essay lacks a clear logical structure, with sentences not flowing naturally from one to the next. To improve, ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all sentences within the paragraph connect to this main idea. Use cohesive devices such as linking words and phrases to create a better flow between sentences and ideas.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present but not fully developed. The introduction should clearly state your position on the topic, and the conclusion should summarize your main points and restate your position. Make sure both are clearly articulated to guide the reader effectively.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are somewhat supported, but the supporting details are limited and lack depth. It's important to develop your main points with specific details, examples, and explanations to fully convey your argument. Aim for at least two detailed supporting points per main idea.
task achievement
Your response to the task is somewhat complete, but the argument is not fully developed. You must address the question directly and ensure that your essay remains focused on answering it throughout. Expand on your ideas to provide a more rounded and comprehensive response.
task achievement
Your ideas are present but not clearly or comprehensively expressed. Strive for clarity and precision in your writing, carefully explaining each point and ensuring that your argument is easy to follow and understand. This might involve more careful planning before writing.
task achievement
Your essay lacks relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. Examples help to illustrate and strengthen your points, making your essay more persuasive. To improve, include concrete examples that directly relate to the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Specialization
  • Skill development
  • Expertise
  • Proficiency
  • Competitive edge
  • Career progression
  • Job market
  • Adaptability
  • Industry changes
  • Burnout
  • Diverse skill set
  • Job satisfaction
  • Personal growth
  • Financial insecurity
  • Transferable skills
  • Lifelong learning
  • Mid-career shift
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