You coach an amateur football team. Write a letter to a local school requesting permission to use their facilities and explaining why your team cannot find facilities and explaining why your team cannot find facilities elsewhere. Suggest how this may be arranged so that your team’s training will not interfere with the school’s activities.

#coach #amateur #football #team #school #permission #facilities #team’s #school’s #activities

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Dear Sir or Madam, I am a coach from

Barcelona

Correct article usage

the Barcelona

show examples

team. I am writing

this

letter

that

Correct word choice

because

show examples

want to get permission

using

Change the verb form

to use

show examples

your

football

field

. I already

check

Wrong verb form

checked

show examples

your

football

field

, and

thinks

Correct subject-verb agreement

think

show examples

that it is the best

football

field

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

this

town.

Although

this

town has a lot of soccer

Fix the agreement mistake

fields

show examples

field

Fix the agreement mistake

fields

show examples

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

but

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

the quality is very bad. My player can injured because the ground is not good. I

also

impress

Change the form of the verb

impressed

show examples

with the facility like

locker

Correct article usage

the locker

show examples

room because it is very clean and comfortable. If you accept my request to

use

your

football

field

will

use

Change preposition

show examples

evening

Correct article usage

the evening

show examples

. I do not want to

distrub

Correct your spelling

disturb

your school activity. I will

use

around

Change preposition

from around

show examples

18.00 until 20.00 every evening, but

will

use

it at 6.00 morning every weekend. I

also

keep your locker room and

field

still tidy, so you do not worry about

this

. I hope you

accepted

Wrong verb form

show examples

my request. Thank you very much Yours faithfully, Andrianto Raharja

Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on Sun Dec 10 2023

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Greetings in formal letters should be more specific. Instead of '\

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
17
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

7 paragraphs

163 words

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

More and more people claim that modern work patterns are a source of stress. What do you think are the causes of this? Can you suggest some possible solutions?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

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A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old fashioned values such as honour, kindness, and trust no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree?