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Band 6

The plans below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant .

#plans #show #park #first #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The maps indicate the changes that have been made to Grange
Park
 since 1920. In general, some facilities have been added and some have been removed,
for example
, there is a new
entrance
 in the southeast corner, and rose gardens have diminished to two from three, and one of them has moved to the central part.
According to
 the figure, starting from
southern
Add an article
the southern
show examples
entrance
 from Eldon Street, the seats and the
garden
 on the left
side
 have been removed and the glasshouse that used to be on the right
side
 of it has been replaced by a water feature
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
beside it in the east corner, there is a new
entrance
 from the underground car
park
.
Further
, in the central area, which was a fountain placed there in 1920, is now a rose
garden
 surrounded by seats.
However
, on the west
side
 of the
park
, where there used to be a stage for musicians, a noticeable change has been made, Now there is an amphitheatre built for concerts, that provides some places to sit for the audience.
Additionally
, there are some noticeable changes around the northern
entrance
 from Arnold Avenue,
firstly
, the seats on the left
side
 have been removed,
as well as
 the
garden
 on the right
side
 that has been taken place by a cafe,
however
, it can be seen that the western
garden
 is still where it used to be.
Finally
, there is an area
that is
 built for children to play, it is where the pond for water plants used to be.
Overall
, now there are more places to sit and enjoy spending time in the
park
.
Submitted by Farzaneh Ka on

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introduction
Ensure you have a clear introduction that gives an overview of the main changes without including too much detail.
coherence
Use a wider range of cohesive devices and transition phrases to improve the flow of your essay.
conclusion
Aim to include a concluding statement that summarises the main changes, rather than introducing new information.
task response
Expand your ideas where possible to provide a more in-depth analysis and comparison of the changes over time.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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