Some people think that it is better for students to work before their university studies. Do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Students
who graduated
from Wrong verb form
graduate
school
are suggested to work by several people,
before they continue for higher education. In my opinion, I cannot agree with Remove the comma
apply
this
idea because high school
curriculum
are not suitable yet for a professional setting. Fix the agreement mistake
curricula
This
essay will explain why the
Correct article usage
apply
students
have to continue their education first rather than working.
First of all, students
who just graduated from high school
mainly do not know which job or professional setting that
they are willing to choose in the future. The main reason why they have little information is because the Correct pronoun usage
apply
school
does not give an introduction about
job markets. To be more precise, It shows the difference between schools and universities. At universities, Change preposition
to
usually
they Add a comma
usually,
provides
the Change the verb form
provide
students
with a career service centre, so the students
can get an information
about types of job and companies as much as they can.
Remove the article
information
a piece of information
Secondly
, university
encourage the Correct article usage
the university
students
to explore many subjects in a specific program. That shows another difference because in high school
they have to be focused on many subjects. For instance
, a student who is highly interested in physics still need
to take a class in social subjects Change the verb form
needs
such
as history. Hence
, the university offers a
more focused learning than high Remove the article
apply
school
so the students
can be prepared for a specific position.
In conclusion, newly
high Change the word
new
school
graduates are not recommended to be involved in working
environment because of Correct article usage
a working
lack
of knowledge. Correct article usage
a lack
Moreover
, it is better for them to continue for a
higher education, either to study Remove the article
apply
in
a university or to Change preposition
at
enroll
Change the spelling
enrol
for
a vocational Change preposition
on
school
that offers a specific subject with practical oriented
modules.Add a hyphen
practical-oriented
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task achievement
Ensure that each main point in your essay is well supported by specific examples or explanations. You can often improve your score by incorporating statistics, citing research, or using hypothetical scenarios that clearly illustrate your points.
coherence cohesion
Work on developing a more logical structure within your paragraphs and across the essay as a whole. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea, supported by detailed explanation and example. Transitions between sentences and ideas should be smooth and easy to follow.
coherence cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are purposeful but could be more impactful. Be sure to succinctly summarize the main points of your argument in both, and attempt to provide a final thought or implication in your conclusion to give your essay a sense of closure.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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