IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

these days, it is easier than ever for people to travel to different places. As a result, many locations that used to be free of tourists have now become popular tourist destinations. Advantatge or disadvantatges?

#people #travel #places #locations #tourists #tourist #destinations #advantatge #disadvantatges
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Traveling
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Travelling
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 is one of the great pleasures of mankind, getting to know distant and remote
places
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 in the world is the purpose of a vacation. Nowadays, it is much easier to discover
places
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 that were previously known only to the locals and that have become
tourist
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destinations
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 because of their accessibility. In
this
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 essay, I will explain the advantages of
traveling
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travelling
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 around the world and discovering any corner of it and the disadvantages of turning virgin
places
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 into
tourist
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destinations
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 with
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 consequences. First of all, a few years ago,
traveling
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travelling
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 by plane was a luxury that was not accessible to everyone because of its high price.
In addition
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, there were no low-cost airlines.
This
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 had an impact on the way of
traveling
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travelling
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, using other types of cheaper transportation and
therefore
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, closer
places
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.
However
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, low-cost airlines have changed the concept of
traveling
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travelling
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, allowing us to use
airplanes
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aeroplanes
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 as a regular means of transportation and discover new
destinations
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 beyond the most touristic ones.
This
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 has had a positive impact on the desire to discover new, untouched
places
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 that not everyone has been able to visit.
On the contrary
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,
this
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 new facility to reach everywhere has provoked
places
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 that previously were not known or little visited to become
tourist
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destinations
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 and,
therefore
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, overcrowded and modified by them, with stores or
places
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 destined for foreign visitors.
For instance
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, in the past, the small villages of Alsace were only visited by the locals, maintaining their charm.
However
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, nowadays, they are overcrowded by tourists at times like Christmas, losing their essence of an authentic village, with souvenir stores, increasing prices in restoration, and changing their typical decoration or structure to make them more attractive to visitors. In conclusion,
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
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 to any point on the world map is satisfying and exciting because it lets us know other cultures and
places
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 previously unthinkable.
However
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,
this
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 has diminished the little
tourist
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destinations
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, making it more difficult to find authenticity.
Submitted by ximmaph on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Include an introduction and conclusion that clearly define the topic and encapsulate the main ideas, respectively, while remaining concise and on topic.
Coherence & Cohesion
Support main points with specific details and examples, but ensure they serve to strengthen the argument without diverting attention away from the main topic or creating irrelevant tangents.
Task Achievement
Provide a complete response to the prompt, covering all aspects of the question without omitting crucial points or introducing unrelated information.
Task Achievement
Develop clear and comprehensive ideas that relate directly to the essay prompt, ensuring that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that ideas are fleshed out with sufficient analysis and detail.
Task Achievement
Include relevant and specific examples to support your arguments. Examples should be well-integrated into the essay and clearly linked to the main points being made.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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