Some people feel that the effects of advertising are positive for individuals and businesses, while others think they are negative. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

#people #effects #individuals #businesses

Advertising

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

always been a topic of debate. Some people

argued

Wrong verb form

argue

show examples

that it is helpful for individuals and businesses, but others believe that it is negative. Even though both

points

of view have actual

points

. I have thought about both sides of

this

topic and I want to talk about them and express my opinion

at the end

. From one point of view, there

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

a number of negative aspects of advertising. First of all, is that they

uses

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use

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tricks. Sometimes some kind of advertising can manipulate us in

such

a way that

even

Rephrase

apply

show examples

ourselves

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

do not realize what exactly we are buying, and

therefore

then

Rephrase

apply

show examples

we will feel disappointed. The second main drawback is that they can be intrusive. We see a lot of ads every day

Change preposition

apply

show examples

everywhere, and

as a result

, it can annoy us,

that is

why we may even skip most of them. From another point of view, the benefits of advertising are not negligible. There is no doubt that they provide lots of information. Through advertising, people can learn about new products and learn information about them.

For instance

, there are a lot of advertisements about medicines on TV.

Consequently

, you can know which medicine to use for which type of disease.

Moreover

, marketing is a way to promote competition. Since there are currently many brands in one typical industry, there should

also

be competition between them.

To sum up

, in

this

essay

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essay,

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I have considered both sides. I strongly believe that the good

points

of advertising outweigh its bad

points

Submitted by crron1985 on Wed Dec 13 2023

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coherence cohesion

Ensure your essay has a clear structure with a defined introduction, body, and conclusion. Each paragraph should have a simple, central idea and stick to it throughout the paragraph.

coherence cohesion

Connect your ideas more effectively with a range of linking words and phrases to show relationships (contrasts, cause and effect, addition, etc.) between ideas and paragraphs.

task achievement

Deepen your main points by providing clear and specific examples to support your arguments. Avoid vague statements.

task achievement

Work on fully addressing the task prompt by discussing both views thoroughly and providing a more detailed personal opinion. Expand your ideas to show a wider range of language and concepts.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

259 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

5.5

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

4.5

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

4.5

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people feel that the effects of advertising are positive for individuals and businesses, while others think they are negative. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In modern times, children are spending less time with their families and more time with their friends. Why has this change occurred? Do you think parents should force their children to spend more time at home?

In the past, people stored knowledge in books. Nowadays people store knowledge on the internet. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

People who live in large cities face a range of problems in their daily life. What are the most significant of these problems? How can these problems be tackled?

Doing an enjoyable activity with a child can develop better skills and more creativity than reading. To what extent do you agree? Use reasons and specific examples to explain your answer.