Development in technology causes environmental problems. Some people believe the solution to these problems is everyone accepts a simpler way of life, while others say that technology can solve these problems. Discuss both views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

Nowadays, environmental problems are burgeoning day by day because of
using
Wrong verb form
the use of
show examples
modern
technology
. Some
people
think that individuals should lead their lives in
normal
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the normal
a normal
show examples
way for
solution
Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
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.
While
others opine that
decreasing
Change the verb form
to decrease
show examples
these problems everyone should use
technology
. In
this
essay
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essay,
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I will discuss both views. I, personally side with the latter view. Generally speaking, there
are
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is
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a wide range of reasons why
people
believe that human life
of
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in
show examples
simple
Correct article usage
a simple
show examples
way
resulting
Wrong verb form
results
show examples
in
healthy
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a healthy
show examples
environment
.
Firstly
, rural
people
moves
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move
show examples
to
urban
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an urban
show examples
city, where they can get modern opportunities to use, but which damage the
environment
from different
aspect
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aspects
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such
as air pollution and sound pollution and so on.
For example
, If
people
lives
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live
show examples
same place and don’t
moves
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move
show examples
anywhere, it may not affect
environment
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the environment
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.
Secondly
, by avoiding personal vehicles, which
emitte
Correct your spelling
emitted
emit
more CO2, for
short
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a short
show examples
distance and they can use public transport, which
also
save money.
For instance
,
according to
a recent survey
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
UNESCO showed that the
people
of Denmark are using eco-friendly bikes, which
are
Verb problem
do
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not
bringing
Wrong verb form
bring
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any detrimental effects and the air of
this
country
95
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is 95
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% healthier than
any
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in any
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other
countries
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country
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.
On the other hand
, who says that only technological
supports
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support
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are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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needed
for facing
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to face
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these problems because
technology
provides plenty of advantages, which are helping our
environment
.
Change the punctuation
?
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To illustrate, by using sea waves, scientist are generating electricity and the amount of electricity are supplied in many areas that are not harmful.
In addition
, public wastes like bottles are
destructing
Verb problem
destroying
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fertile soil,
as a
result
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result,
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farmers cannot grow crops in the fields. So, industries can recycle these kinds of
product
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products
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for
variety
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a variety
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of purposes. In conclusion, eliminating modern
technology
in today’s era
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is not a positive development and arduous task for everyone.
People
cannot live solely without technological development.
Submitted by ielts on

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Introduction/Conclusion
Ensure that the introduction provides a clear background for the topic you are discussing; it should set the stage for the later points in the essay. Also, make sure the conclusion accurately reflects the discussion held within the main body of the text, addressing both perspectives and your own take on the issue.
Logical Structure
Work on developing a more logical structure that guides the reader through the argument. The essay should smoothly transition from one idea to the next, with each paragraph focused on a single main point that ties back to the essay question. Use phrases and terms that make the connections between ideas clear to the reader.
Supported Points
Strengthen your main points with more detailed explanations and a more extensive range of examples. This provides the reader with a deeper understanding of your viewpoint and demonstrates your ability to discuss concepts in depth.
Complete Response
To achieve a higher score, make sure that the response fully answers all parts of the question. It should discuss both views and provide a clear personal opinion. The essay needs to show a comprehensive understanding of the topic, with all the main points appropriately addressed.
Clear Ideas
Try to express your ideas more clearly and comprehensively. Work on precision and clarity in your sentence construction to ensure that your arguments are communicated effectively. Avoid overly complex structures that may confuse the reader.
Relevant Examples
Use a wider range of relevant and specific examples to support your points and illustrate the arguments. Relate these examples to the main topic and ensure they are directly linked to the issues being discussed.
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