Some students take a gap year after graduating high school to work and/or travel. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this.

Taking a break after finishing high school has become more common among
students
who want time off before college or work.
While
there are several advantages to taking a
gap
year
, there are
also
some drawbacks that need to be considered. On the one hand, a
gap
year
can offer many benefits for young people. First and foremost, one of the primary advantages is the opportunity to gain practical skills and hands-on experience. For
examples
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example
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, these experiences can range from learning new languages,
developing
Correct word choice
and developing
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leadership skills, to understanding work environments – all of which can be advantageous in future studies or career paths.
Furthermore
, taking a break helps
students
figure out what they want to study or do for work. Indeed, after high school,
students
can try things like internships to see what they like, and that can help them decide what to do next.
On the other hand
,
although
taking a
year
off can offer certain benefits for
students
, its drawbacks are much greater. The first point is the financial burden when some
students
cannot afford
for
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apply
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the travelling fee.
As a result
,
this
make
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makes
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a few people detract
for
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from
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the experience and incur debt in their
gap
years.
In addition
,
this
trend can cause difficulties for you if you want to get back to
universities
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university
show examples
. Indeed, many forms of financial aid, scholarships and so on are
just
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apply
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available for
the
Correct article usage
apply
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students
right after graduation,
thus
missing out
them
Change preposition
on them
show examples
is a great disadvantage for them. In conclusion, taking a
gap
year
after graduating high school can offer numerous benefits but it
also
poses challenges.
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Task achievement: You identified advantages and disadvantages of the gap year, but some of your ideas weren't fully developed. The examples provided were not detailed enough to fully support your arguments. For a higher score, provide more comprehensive reasoning, and offer specific, well-elaborated examples to illustrate your points.
structure
Coherence and cohesion: Your essay has a recognizable structure but could benefit from clearer connections between ideas. The transitions between the paragraphs could be smoother and linking phrases should be used more effectively. To improve your score, work on your paragraphing so that each contains one clear main idea and a cohesive structure throughout.

Fully explain your ideas

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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