Some student work while studying.This often results in lacking tome for education and constantly feeling under pressure. What do you think are the cause of this? What solution can yoi suggest?
In
this
present scenario mostly
Correct your spelling
most
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
found
working and studying at the same Add a missing verb
are found
time
. Some of them manage their work
and study
while
other gets frustrated and depressed. Many student
lack financiallyand tents
to Correct your spelling
finances and tend
be
Change the verb form
work
work
for
their own by themselves. Change preposition
on
However
, some of them thought that working in any institution would grab the experience for future benefits and they were more secure to get higher
level of job after completing Add an article
a higher
of
their Change preposition
apply
study
level.
First of all, the main causes behind the lacking
Replace the word
lack of
time
for education ia due to
the financial strike and due to
the high rate of Change preposition
apply
fee
that Fix the agreement mistake
fees
Correct article usage
the universitie
universitie
has taken into Correct your spelling
universities
university
the
consideration. For Correct article usage
apply
intance
, when Correct your spelling
instance
i
used to read Change the capitalization
I
bbs
1st year, my friend Correct your spelling
BBS
sareeta
used to teach in Change the capitalization
Sareeta
private
boarding school. Correct article usage
a private
Similarly
, she used to take only three periods and miss the last
two periods. Due to
her poor economic condition, she could not afford the college fee
. Fix the agreement mistake
fees
Moreover
, sge
feels down Correct your spelling
she
while
exam comes near. Correct word choice
when
On the other hand
, spme of the private institution takes experienced worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
thats
way, Correct your spelling
that
student
have to Fix the agreement mistake
students
work
to grab
Verb problem
gain
the
experience. Correct article usage
apply
Likewise
, the lower education system of the government universities makes the student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
to
join private Fix the infinitive
apply
foundation
out of their family background.
The students who Fix the agreement mistake
foundations
work
and study
at a
same period should manage their Correct article usage
the
time table
properly. Correct your spelling
timetable
Ratherly
, Correct your spelling
Rather
i
would suggest them to do Change the capitalization
I
part
Add a hyphen
part-time
time
job for two three
hours only. Add a hyphen
two-three
Subsequently
, family
should understand their Add an article
the family
a family
children
Change noun form
children's
ability
and encourage them in Fix the agreement mistake
abilities
right
way. Many universities should provide Add an article
the right
the
free education to Correct article usage
apply
the high
skilled Rephrase
highly
student
. Fix the agreement mistake
students
Furthermore
, fund
should be Add an article
the fund
a fund
Wrong verb form
raised
raise
Wrong verb form
raised
Change preposition
for
to
those who Change preposition
for
belongs
to poor family background.
In conclusion, Change the verb form
belong
study
and Wrong verb form
studying
work
at the same Wrong verb form
working
time
is more pressurized so, both family and university support is
needed and Correct subject-verb agreement
are
expertise
students should be taken to take the class free.Replace the word
expert
Submitted by dahalchandra75 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and avoid using too many ideas in one paragraph. This will help maintain a logical structure throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion should effectively introduce the topic and summarize the main points without introducing new ideas. Your conclusion was appropriate, but the introduction could be more specific to the essay question.
coherence cohesion
Support main points with specific examples and explanations to provide a thorough understanding of the topic. Some of your points lacked the necessary detail to fully convince the reader.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task and make sure your essay is a complete response to the question, including reasons and solutions. While your essay did touch on the reasons and solutions, the connection to the question could be made clearer.
task achievement
Present ideas clearly and comprehensively, ensuring they are well-developed and expanded upon. Aim to go into more depth with each point and support it with reasoning or examples.
task achievement
Use relevant and specific examples to illustrate your points. The example of the student Sareeta was relevant but ensure that any examples provided are fully fleshed out and contribute significantly to the overall argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.