Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads To what extent do you agree or disagree?
The population of the current world tend to think differently on a debit how beneficial the rail line and harbour
systemsare
. A small number of groups think that ministries invest their budget in rail lines Correct your spelling
systems
systems are
instead
of harbours. I firmly agree with Linking Words
this
opinion. In the following parts, I will try to explain why I am a supporter of Linking Words
this
argument.
First of all, transportation is the biggest issue so as to the lands ; Linking Words
Therefore
, Many various vehicles have been established. The category of tracks belongs to subways, trains and trams Linking Words
as well as
category of wharves includes trumps, buses and cars. The railway tools are more enviromentalist Linking Words
due to
the use of electricity Linking Words
nonetheless
the means of roads utilize fuel oil Linking Words
along with
diesel oil which is harmful to the sky. It is the air pollution that will make our breath worse. Linking Words
As a consequence
, we can analyse it in some areas which are crowded and have a big problem with jams. South Korea is a commonly known sample of Linking Words
this
situation since they use cars more than undergrounds so they have had grey sky for years Linking Words
furthermore
they do not listen to the suggestions of experts .
Linking Words
On the other hand
, Tracks are useful for trading. Especially the authorities which have important ports, fields and areas, emphasise how important a good infrastructure is for growing so as to the authorities. Linking Words
In addition
, many years ago the trains functioned with charcoals Linking Words
together with
it was the reason for air pollution nowadays it seems to Linking Words
lose
Wrong verb form
have lost
this
position.
In conclusion, rail lines can flatly be seen to be better than wharves. Linking Words
Thereafter
governments try to work about that railways must cover all lands suitable for transport because of the reasons described afore.Linking Words
Submitted by ezgi.maide.213 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical structure in your essay. Your writing should include an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, each serving its clear purpose. Additionally, ideas should flow logically from one to another, often using linking words or phrases to help the reader see connections between points.
coherence cohesion
Clarify your introduction and conclusion. Both should unambiguously present the topic and your stance on it, and they should relate closely to each other to provide the reader with a strong opening and a decisive closing. Your introduction was somewhat unclear, and the conclusion should restate your main points more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Back up your main points with clear examples or evidence. Your argument will be much stronger if you can provide specific instances, facts, or data that support your point of view. In this essay, the examples provided were not fully relevant or specific enough to bolster the arguments.
task achievement
Ensure your response fully addresses all parts of the task. You must provide a clear position throughout the response and adequately support your argument. While you took a clear stance, there were moments where your focus drifted, and some parts of the prompt were not addressed as fully as they could have been.
task achievement
Work on expressing your ideas more clearly and comprehensively. Aim to have each paragraph present a single clear idea and ensure that you explain this idea thoroughly. Make sure your writing can be easily followed and understood by the reader. In this essay, some ideas were not well developed or explained, making it difficult to follow your argument.
task achievement
Use relevant, specific examples to support your argument. The inclusion of specific, real-world examples makes your essay more persuasive and informative. In this essay, more detailed and directly relevant examples are needed to effectively support your stance.