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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart below gives information about global population percentages and distribution of wealth by region. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives information about global population percentages and distribution of wealth by region. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #population #percentages #distribution #wealth #region #summarise #features #comparisons
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The given bar graph
illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
show examples
 about
total
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a total
show examples
 of people and
proportion
Correct article usage
the proportion
show examples
 of
wealth
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 in several countries; which are North
America
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, China, India, Europe, Africa, Latin
America
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 and
Carabean
Correct your spelling
Caribbean
, Rich
Asia
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 Pacific and Other
Asia
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Use synonyms
Pasific
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Pacific
. The units are, measured in percentage for both
population
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 and
golbal
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global
wealth
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 in every
country
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.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be clearly seen that three nations; North
America
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, Europe, and Rich
Asia
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Use synonyms
Pasific
Correct your spelling
Pacific
, have a bigger global
wealth
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 compared with the
population
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.
On the contrary
Linking Words
, the rest of
other
Correct your spelling
the
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 countries, have a smaller global
wealth
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 than
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 citizens. In terms of the biggest global
wealth
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country
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, which is North
America
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, it had approximately 34 per
cent
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 of
global
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the global
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 world with 5 per
cent
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 of
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population
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the population
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. The figure
of
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for
show examples
Europe
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Europe's
show examples
wealth
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stand
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stands
show examples
at
Change preposition
in
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 the second position, with exactly 30 per
cent
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 and the
population
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 just
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half
from
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of
show examples
 it.
Subsequenly
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Subsequently
, Rich
Asia
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Use synonyms
Pasific
Correct your spelling
Pacific
 global
wealth
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, it has about 10 per
cent
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 and the
population
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one
Add a missing verb
is one
show examples
 point lower than North
America
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.
Regarding the
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The
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 most populous
country
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,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is China with nearly 25 per
cent
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 compared with all
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country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
. China and Other
Asia
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Use synonyms
Pasific
Correct your spelling
Pacific
 have the same number of global
wealth
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 with only three per
cent
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.
However
Linking Words
, the percentage of
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population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 in Other
Asia
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Use synonyms
Pasific
Correct your spelling
Pacific
 and India both at precisely 15 per
cent
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. Meanwhile Africa, with only 10 per
cent
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 of
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population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 has the same
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
global
wealth
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of
Change preposition
as
show examples
 India at 1 per
cent
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.
Lastly
Linking Words
, Latin
America
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 and
Carabean
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Caribbean
 only have a small gap, with 8 per
cent
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population
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 and 2 per
cent
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 bellow with the global
wealth
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.
Submitted by 2024successielts on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words wealth, america, asia, pasific, population, country, cent with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • chart
  • global population
  • distribution of wealth
  • percentages
  • region
  • Asia
  • Africa
  • Europe
  • North America
  • South America
  • Oceania
  • disparity
  • account for
  • follow
  • despite
  • vary
  • demonstrate
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