The table below shows the consumption of three basic foods, rice, wheat and maize, by people in four different countries

The table below shows the consumption of three basic foods, rice, wheat and maize, by people in four different countries
The given table provides information on the daily
consumption
of three basic foods by the citizens of
four
different countries.
Overall
, one noticeable feature is Egypt consumes
highest
Change the article
the highest
show examples
amount of
calories
per
day
 out of all
four
countries.
Moreover
, Poland does not
consumes
Change the verb form
consume
show examples
any
maize
. At over 2000
calories
per
day
, Egyptians have the highest
intake
of
calories
among all
four
nations,
along with
along with
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
 the highest
consumption
of 
wheat
(1095
calories
/
day
). Their
consumption
of both
rice
501
Add a missing verb
is 501
show examples
calories
and
maize
578
Add a missing verb
is 578
show examples
calorie
Change to a plural noun
calories
show examples
around
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half of their
intake
of
wheat
.
In
addition
Add a comma
addition,
show examples
the largest
consumption
of
rice
is by
Cambodian
Fix the agreement mistake
Cambodians
show examples
at 1445
calories
per
day
,
while
their
intake
of
calories
from
wheat
and
maize
were (18) and (103) respectively.
Moreover
,
Mexican
Replace the word
Mexicans
show examples
get more of their
calories
from
Maize
(1083
calorie
Fix the agreement mistake
calories
show examples
/
day
), and the
consumption
of
rice
and
wheat
accounted for 332
calories
daily. The most interesting feature is that Poland
consume
Change the verb form
consumes
show examples
the lowest amount of
calories
among all the
four
countries. The daily
intake
of (19
calorie
Fix the agreement mistake
calories
show examples
/
day
) and (865
calorie
Fix the agreement mistake
calories
show examples
/
day
) from
rice
and
wheat
respectively.
Submitted by asoom on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "along with, moreover".
Vocabulary: Replace the words consumption, four, calories, day, maize, intake, wheat, rice, calorie with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: