There is now a shortage of physicians and teachers in job within the excess of those who work in IT fields. What are the reasons and to what consequences this development can lead us?

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Nowadays, many people prefer to specialize in IT and sectors that are related to computers compared to the small percentage that has chosen to be teachers and physicians. On the one hand, the benefits that they can gain from working in the IT
field
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are variable from high salaries to flexible working hours.
On the other hand
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,
this
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may lead to a lot of difficulty in finding a job in
this
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sector
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due to
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the hard competition. In the beginning, IT
field
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workers agreed that working in
this
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sector
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has provided them ease and smoothness. Being able to work from your home with big companies like Google or Meta and having a large wage is a privilege that makes many folks focus on IT
instead
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of any other
field
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.
In addition
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, they will have a lot of time that others waste on transportation, giving them the facility to enjoy life and being able to do many things during their leisure time.
Conversely
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, increasing the number of workers in the IT
sector
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will be the key factor in raising the percentage of unemployed people in
this
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field
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. As students these days are more interested in IT, the competition between them will
will
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apply
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grow more in the future.
As a result
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, companies will pick the elite of the elite to do their work, and many of these students will not be accepted for work in
this
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field
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in the next decades.
For example
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, many big technology companies employ graduates from well-known universities like Harvard, leaving the other graduates with no hope of working for them.
To sum up
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,
while
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working in IT could have many advantages that most of us are keen to have still, we societies should pay attention to the number of employees in each
sector
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, so they do not elevate the number of unemployed people.
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task achievement
Try to provide more specific examples to support your points. This will make your arguments stronger and more convincing.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence that states the main idea. This will make it easier for the reader to follow your argument.
coherence cohesion
Work on the clarity of some sentences, as a few of them could be more concise to enhance readability.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, which helps to frame the discussion effectively.
task achievement
You have addressed the task prompt well by discussing both the reasons for the preference for IT jobs and the potential consequences.
coherence cohesion
The essay maintains a logical structure, with each paragraph focusing on a specific aspect of the topic.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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