Car ownership has increased so rapidly over past thirty years that may cities in the world are now on big traffic jam. How true do you think this statement is? How government should encourage people to reduce using their cars.

A rise in
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
of
cars
not only
become
Correct subject-verb agreement
becomes
show examples
a cause of
traffic
but
also
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
people
think about its reduction.
Traffic
jam has proved that
people
are getting more
cars
in
this
era and creating more obstacles in urban
cities
,
therefore
, I will shed some light on
this
statement and give some solution, how government can tackle these problems.
To begin
with,
traffic
has increased day by day as every household
purchasing
Wrong verb form
purchases
show examples
a
number
of
cars
. To exemplify,
people
neglect to be dependent on others and they desire new
cars
to commute
one
Change preposition
from one
show examples
place to another,
therefore
,
people
have to face
traffice
Correct your spelling
traffic
in big
cities
.
For instance
, International Magazine has shown that 80% of families in urban
cities
have three
vehicles
in each house, which,
as a result
,
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
big
cities
crowded.
Also
, bringing
vehicles
on the road has become risky because
Correct article usage
the accidents
show examples
accidents
Change the noun form
accident
show examples
rate is increasing every year
due to
heavy
traffic
. To mitigate these problems,
government's
Correct article usage
the government's
show examples
intervention has become necessary as
people
would not consider reducing
cars
without rules and regulations.
First
Change the article
The first
show examples
step would be
by imposing
Change preposition
to impose
show examples
tax
Add an article
a tax
show examples
on buying
vehicles
and limiting car
number
Fix the agreement mistake
numbers
show examples
for every family in order to get good results. With
this
initiative,
people
avoid purchasing more than one car and will learn to share one vehicle.
Secondly
, some parking spaces should be paid
so
Change preposition
for so
show examples
that drivers feel hesitation to travel in
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
vehicle
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and use public transport
istead
Correct your spelling
instead
. To put it in
nutshell
Correct article usage
a nutshell
show examples
, I pen down saying that getting a
number
of
cars
put
Wrong verb form
puts
show examples
urban
cities
in
worse
Add an article
a worse
show examples
situation but if
Correct article usage
the goverment
show examples
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
take
Correct subject-verb agreement
takes
show examples
some measures regarding
this
issue by implementing some
Change preposition
of above
show examples
above given
Add a hyphen
above-given
show examples
rules
then
we can protect our beautiful
cities
from the
crowed
Correct your spelling
crowd
show examples
of
vehicles
.
Submitted by maninderdeep on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Consider structuring your essay more clearly by having a distinct introduction, body paragraphs (with a single idea per paragraph), and a conclusion. Use topic sentences to introduce your main ideas and subsequent sentences should directly support and elaborate on those points.
Coherence & Cohesion
Work on the logical flow of ideas. Transition words and phrases can help guide the reader through your arguments and improve the readability of your essay.
Task Achievement
To improve task achievement, ensure all parts of the prompt are fully addressed. Develop your solutions more fully and offer a broader range of ideas for how the government could address car usage and traffic congestion.
Task Achievement
Include specific examples or data to support your arguments. This adds credibility to your writing and allows you to demonstrate a broader range of language skills.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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