IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

the growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in town adn cities closing . do you agree or disagree ?

#growth #shops #town #adn #cities
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Online shopping has been increasing tremendously as compared to the past days.
However
Linking Words
, some
argued
Wrong verb form
argue
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 that virtual shopping will dominate all direct
shops
Use synonyms
 in
future
Use synonyms
.
While
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 I do not believe that because most people like to buy
things
Use synonyms
 from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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direct
shops
Use synonyms
instead
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 of online, purchasing from the online platform brings some
befits
Correct your spelling
benefits
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such
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 as
time
Use synonyms
 saving
as well as
Linking Words
 providing many offers.
To begin
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 with, purchasing from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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virtual shopping platforms can save more
time
Use synonyms
 which means people can access and place
Use synonyms
order
Fix the agreement mistake
orders
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 anywhere through
the
Correct article usage
apply
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mobile
apps
Use synonyms
 within a fraction of
Correct article usage
a seconds
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seconds
Fix the agreement mistake
second
show examples
.
For example
Linking Words
, some online shopping
apps
Use synonyms
 are provided numerous offers and discounts in
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 in
order
Use synonyms
 to they are able to impress customers to buy frequently.
In addition
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,
virtual
Correct article usage
the virtual
show examples
 shopping platform has multifarious
brands item
Fix the agreement mistake
brand items
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 in one place,
therefore
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. People can compare
price
Fix the agreement mistake
prices
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 and quality easily and
place
Replace the word
placing
show examples
Use synonyms
order
Change the form of the verb
orders
show examples
Linking Words
also
Add a missing verb
is also
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 not difficult just one click your
things
Use synonyms
 will come quickly.
Hence
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, in the
Use synonyms
future
Add a comma
future,
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 the local
shops
Use synonyms
 will be closed by the virtual shopping
apps
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
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, the local
shops
Use synonyms
 will not be closed by virtual shopping because the population
like
Replace the word
likes
show examples
 to purchase
things
Use synonyms
 from
the directing
Replace the word
direct
show examples
 shopping.
Which
Correct pronoun usage
This
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 means the public considers
the
Correct determiner usage
that
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 online products may be damaged, less quality and
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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takes
Correct subject-verb agreement
take
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 more
time
Use synonyms
for shipping
Change preposition
to ship
show examples
.
For instance
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, the local vendors give the chance to
bargaining
Wrong verb form
bargain with
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 the customer in
order
Use synonyms
 to
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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attract the customer
will
Correct pronoun usage
who will
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 come frequently in
future
Use synonyms
 but
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this
Change the determiner
these
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 facilities are not impossible in the online shopping platform
due to
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 the fixed price.
Therefore
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, mankind
love
Change the verb form
loves
show examples
 to buy
things
Use synonyms
 from their local shop
at
Change preposition
apply
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now,
similarly
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, in the
future
Use synonyms
this
Linking Words
 trend indeed will be continued.
To conclude
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,
although
Linking Words
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
online
shoppings
Change the noun form
shopping
show examples
apps
Use synonyms
 can save
time
Use synonyms
as well as
Linking Words
 provide plenty
offers
Change preposition
of offers
show examples
 and discounts,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
local
shops
Use synonyms
 give bargaining amenities to the customers
along with
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 mankind can check products whether
being
Wrong verb form
are
show examples
 damaged or not.
Therefore
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, I partially agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement in the above-mentioned details.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

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