Write about the following topic: In many countries, not enough students study science subjects. What are the causes? What will be the effect on society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#topic #countries #students #study #science #subjects #effect #society

Certian

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Certain

nations lack the

amount

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number

show examples

students

who choose the

scientfic

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scientific

faculties. The reasons behind it might cover many

domainds

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domains

including;

fininacial

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financial

situations and advanced technologies.

This

essay will discuss the factors contributing to the phenomenon and the

relevent

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relevant

impacts

among

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show examples

communities.

First,

many undergraduate

students

are affected by the rapid internet evolution, which facilitated

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

easy access to many basic and sophisticated information.

Therefore

students

now choose a career path that depends on their knowledge and skills,

in other words

, they want a career where they can not be replaced with technological devices.

For instance

, studying physics is not

fundemntal

Correct your spelling

fundamental

in contributing to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

coorperate

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corporate

work, because you can find any piece of information using Google.

On the other hand

, if

this

happened

Wrong verb form

happens

show examples

Change preposition

show examples

the

long-term

Correct your spelling

long term

show examples

, it

will

Wrong verb form

would

show examples

decrease the amount of

science

teacher

Fix the agreement mistake

teachers

show examples

, and

thus

, it will negatively affect the learning process in schools, so the upcoming generations will not

obtian

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obtain

the needed scientific background, because they will not prefer to spend screen times of valuable

science

materials

instead

of low-valued

joyfull

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joyful

joyfully

content.

Second,

when

someon

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someone

thinks about his or her career path, they

definetly

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definitely

consider the future net income, and

studing

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studying

science

courses doesn't usually lead to a wealthy lifestyle.

Accordingly

students

will prefer conducting a major that helps

enhancing

Wrong verb form

enhance

show examples

their

finiancial

Correct your spelling

financial

worth, rather than choosing an average path with a middle-income life.

Nevertheless

students

still underestimate the

improtance

Correct your spelling

importance

science

, because earning

konweldge

Correct your spelling

knowledge

also

valuable, and it

facilitate

Change the verb form

facilitates

show examples

having more money in one way or another, so eventually, people might have enough money but will never have enough information to elevate

your

Correct pronoun usage

their

show examples

position, and

thus

will not have many achievements in life. In conclusion, some pupils avoid studying scientific courses because they want a higher income or a challenging job. But the community significantly needs scientific jobs to be richer in

knoweldge

Correct your spelling

knowledge

and to educate the upcoming generations.

Submitted by makahlehaseel on Sun Dec 17 2023

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coherence cohesion

There are noticeable issues with the logical structure of your essay. Your ideas need to be presented in a clearer and more organized manner. Ensure that each paragraph has a central idea that is developed logically.

coherence cohesion

Introduction and conclusion are present but could be better structured. It is important that these paragraphs distinctly present the topic and summarize the main points, respectively. Work on making your introduction more engaging and your conclusion more conclusive.

coherence cohesion

You made an effort to support your main points, but the support provided lacks depth and breadth. Aim to provide more detailed examples and a deeper analysis of the issues you mention.

task achievement

You addressed the task and provided responses to the prompts, but you could have developed your ideas more completely. Make sure you fully expand upon the causes and effects mentioned, providing comprehensive insight into the topic.

task achievement

Your ideas are understandable, but they need to be expressed more clearly and comprehensively. Work on clarifying your thoughts and making them more robust.

task achievement

Provide relevant and specific examples to strengthen your arguments. The examples given lack specificity and do not sufficiently support your points. Use concrete evidence from your knowledge or experience to make your essay more persuasive.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

313 words

4.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Write about the following topic: In many countries, not enough students study science subjects. What are the causes? What will be the effect on society? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Fully explain your ideas

Too many young people and too many old people do not exercise enough. What is causing this ? What can be done to change this ? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

It is better to buy just a few expensive clothes, rather than lots of cheaper clothes. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays some buildings such as offices and school have open space design instead of separate rooms . Why it is so ?Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that the purpose of education is to prepare people to useful members of society. Others think that the purpose of education is to help people to achieve personal ambitions. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.