Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #university #college #route #career #job #school

Few

individual

Fix the agreement mistake

individuals

show examples

believe that learning things at university is the better way. It is commonly believed that

study

Wrong verb form

studying

show examples

makes people

best

Correct article usage

the best

show examples

in their

life

whilst there are others who

prostulate

Correct your spelling

postulate

postulated

that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

after school

life

ending

Wrong verb form

ends

show examples

people should

be go

Change the verb form

show examples

for a

job

. In my opinion,I believe that

study

is the best option in everyone's

life

Moreover

, Everyone has to

fillup

Correct your spelling

fill up

show examples

their University

Life

. On the one hand, becoming a studious

person

gives you a

backet

Correct your spelling

basket

bucket

packet

of knowledge and higher

study

is essential for

become

Change the verb form

becoming

show examples

graduate

Correct article usage

a graduate

show examples

. A fully

graduative

Correct your spelling

graduated

person

Change the article

show examples

honourable

person

in their

life

and they don't need any favour to get a

job

. It is

therefore

agreed that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

a fully

graduative

Correct your spelling

graduated

person

can get a

job

easily because of their degrees,which they will achieve from higher

study

. In

Correct article usage

the daily

show examples

daily star

Correct your spelling

Daily Star

show examples

, every week

Change the article

show examples

article

has been

Wrong verb form

show examples

given by many companies,

which

Change preposition

about which

show examples

company

need

Correct subject-verb agreement

needs

show examples

manager

Correct article usage

a manager

show examples

Officer

Correct article usage

an Officer

show examples

etc. A

compolsary

Correct your spelling

compulsory

fully

graduative

Correct your spelling

graduating

graduation

graduate

document needed,for

job

certificate.

On the other hand

, there are some other individuals who

believed

Wrong verb form

believe

show examples

that after completing school

life

straight

Rephrase

apply

show examples

get

Wrong verb form

getting

show examples

job

is a better option and it deprives

from

Change the preposition

show examples

time wastage.

However

, School

life

is just

Correct article usage

the

show examples

first step in everyone's

life

According to

some people

get

Wrong verb form

getting

show examples

job

can give

money

Correct pronoun usage

them money

show examples

and

also

saving

Wrong verb form

save

show examples

time.

Otherwise

completing full

study

benefial

Correct your spelling

beneficial

everyones

Change to a genitive case

everyone's

show examples

life

. In my opinion, updating the future can change our generation.

Therefore

, It is possible when we look

our

Change preposition

at our

show examples

learning thing seriously.

For instance

, In many

Correct your spelling

show examples

news,

such

as Jamuna

Correct your spelling

show examples

channel

Correct word choice

and channel

show examples

24, they

telecast

Verb problem

broadcast

show examples

the broadcast of

job

interview

Fix the agreement mistake

interviews

show examples

, where every

gradutive

Correct your spelling

graduating

graduate

graduation

person

gives their viva test. In conclusion,

study

Add an article

the study

a study

show examples

is a very essential thing in

everyones

Change to a genitive case

everyone's

show examples

Life

Beacause

Correct your spelling

Because

we know that knowledge is one of the biggest

power

Fix the agreement mistake

powers

show examples

this

generation. So, we should

study

more and more for our upcoming future. Only knowledge can save our future.

Submitted by ilhanctg2019 on Mon Dec 18 2023

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coherence cohesion

The essay lacks clear and logically connected ideas. The paragraph structure needs improvement, with better topic sentences and development of ideas. Transitions between sentences and ideas should be smooth and demonstrate clear connections. Avoid repetitive and incomplete sentences. Use a variety of sentence structures and ensure paragraphs flow logically from one to the next.

task achievement

The essay does not fully address the prompt. It is necessary to discuss both sides of the argument equally before providing a personal opinion. The response should be expanded to include specific examples and explanations of points made. Please make sure to directly respond to all parts of the task, ensuring a clear and complete presentation of your views on the subject.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
46Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

311 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Academic qualifications
Specialized skills
In-depth knowledge
Personal growth
Social development
Practical experience
Financial independence
Career progression
Professional networking
Education
Work experience
Successful career
Personal interests
Career goals
Decision-making process

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Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that children should study formal learning at school as young as possible. Others believe they should not go to school until they are at least 7. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that e-books are the death of paper books, while others think that paper books will never disappear. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

People will buy a product if it has quality or fulfil their needs. There is no need for advertisement. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many think that all decisions within a company should be made by managers whereas others feel it is better to include employees in the process. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.