Some people think that teenagers should work.Do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays,it is argued that teens must work despite their age.Working can help them to earn
money
and they can find themselves on different career paths, which will allow them to gain experience .I completely agree with this
idea.In the forthcoming paragraphs,I shall delve deep into how working early can be beneficial for youngsters.
To begin
with,to start working as a student can help to be financially independent. By earning cash from a particular job teens can spend the money
for
their essentials and so on.They can learn how to manage Change preposition
on
money
,how to spend and how to value their income.It will make them experienced and educated in a financial way.For instance
,children spend their time working,
and can purchase whatever they want with their own Remove the comma
apply
money
.By spending it they will learn how to spend their salaries step-by-step.What's more,there is no need to ask their parent for money
.
In addition
, young workers must do their best-loved jobs. I would like to point out that it will help them to find their dream job.And if they reach their favourite work,they will be more capable and successful in the future.Then
, they can create huge plans for their future as they know their path in life.
Finally
,kids should be allowed to work.It will help them to develop different skills and experiences.They will be able to manage their money
and find out their own paths in this
lifeSubmitted by medet.khan774 on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to have a clear introduction with a thesis statement that outlines the main points of the essay. The conclusion should restate the main points and clearly express your final position.
coherence cohesion
Organize your essay into clear paragraphs, each with a central idea supported by specific examples or explanations. Use a variety of cohesive devices to link ideas and paragraphs together smoothly.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task, ensuring a complete response to the prompt. Develop each main point with appropriate details and relevant examples to demonstrate a comprehensive understanding of the topic.
coherence cohesion
Employ more varied and complex sentence structures to articulate ideas clearly and effectively. Avoid repetitive sentence beginnings and structure for more sophistication in your writing.
task achievement
Provide more specific, detailed examples to support your arguments and demonstrate the relevance of your points. Avoid overgeneralized statements that do not add value to the essay.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite