Air travel can only benefit the richest people in the world. Ordinary people have little to gain from the development of air travel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#air #travel #benefit #people #world #gain #development

My motivation in participating in the CrossCulture

Program

is to increase my network, especially with NGO networks abroad, enrich my mindset by understanding the culture in Germany, and improve my

ability

to process information related to the environment. These three things are my main goals in participating in

this

activity. Surely

this

activity will improve my

ability

to serve my current organization -Forest Watch Indonesia- and benefit the community and the environment. These three things are very sustainable with each other and can be achieved by participating in the Cross-Cultural

Program

. I believe I can achieve all of them by joining

this

program

For example

, I am currently working at Forest Watch Indonesia as a GIS Specialist. My job allows me to calculate which areas are affected by deforestation.

This

then

linked to my

ability

to provide information to people who need

this

data.

This

ability

will improve over time with the CrossCulture

Program

. I will do my best to implement my skills for the public good.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Mon Dec 18 2023

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task achievement

The provided text does not address the IELTS essay topic of air travel's benefits to different economic classes. Instead, it discusses personal motivations for participating in a cross-cultural program. To improve, focus on directly answering the prompt with relevant arguments and examples. Begin with an introduction that paraphrases the question, proceed with body paragraphs providing arguments and examples aligned with the topic, and end with a conclusion summarizing your position.

coherence and cohesion

Ensure logical progression of ideas by organizing paragraphs with clear topic sentences followed by supporting details. Use a range of cohesive devices to link your ideas and paragraphs. Consistency in voice and tense can also enchance the clarity of your message. For this particular response, there is a need to structure the content as per the IELTS essay requirements.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

168 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Affordable travel
Accessibility
Leisure travel
Business travel
Economic benefits
Job creation
Tourism
Global connectivity
Cultural exchange
Social ties
Natural disasters
Medical emergencies
Innovation
Competitive pricing
Airline industry
Enhanced local economies
Cultural understanding
Timely aid
Emergency response
Aviation sector

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Air travel can only benefit the richest people in the world. Ordinary people have little to gain from the development of air travel. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

pie chart about difference in population three age groups in italy and yemene between 2000 and 2050

Many organizations and companies ask their staff to wear a uniform. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

It is better for people to be unemployed than being employed with a job they do not enjoy. To what extent do you agree or disagree?