Present a written argument or case to an educated reader with no specialist knowledge of the following topic: According to those in the travel business, the nature of the average 'holiday' is changing. Rather than seeking a relaxing break in a far-away place, people now want excitement on their holidays and are keen to participate in unusual and challenging activities. Do you agree or disagree?
#argument #case #reader #specialist #topic #travel #business #nature #holiday #place #people #excitement #holidays #activities
The bar chart gives information about the
students
which
enrolled in Correct pronoun usage
who
music
faculty in Correct article usage
the music
Australian
university over a period of 6 years, and the pie chart provides how they chose their Correct article usage
an Australian
career
after Fix the agreement mistake
careers
the
graduation.
It is visible that the Correct article usage
apply
number
of men
scholars Correct your spelling
male
which
registered in Correct pronoun usage
who
music
section Correct article usage
the music
were
lower than women scholars.
In 2000, both genders were the same with numbers of 20 Change the verb form
was
percent
, but from 2001 male Change the spelling
per cent
students
has
been decreased significantly with Change the verb form
have
number
of 15 Change the article
a number
the number
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
,
and stayed parallel from 2001 till 2004. In 2006 Remove the comma
apply
number
of male Change the article
a number
the number
students
were the same as at the beginning.
Female scholars
Change noun form
scholar's
scholars'
percent
, Change the spelling
per cent
on the contrary
, improved from time to time. And in 2006 the number
of female students
peaked at 60 percent
.
In the pie chart, students
which
enrolled in music class chose their career and 55 Correct pronoun usage
who
percent
of them chose Change the spelling
per cent
the
different profession, 25 Correct article usage
a
percent
chose Change the spelling
per cent
the
similar occupation and 20 Correct article usage
a
percent
chose the same career as their academic work.
#Guljahon #Report3Change the spelling
per cent
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task response
The task response is minimal and lacks full development of ideas. The essay needs to address the topic more directly and comprehensively, providing a clear position on the changing nature of holidays. You should work on expanding your argument by discussing the shift towards excitement and challenging activities, including specific examples to illustrate your points and create a robust argument.
logical structure
Your essay lacks a clear and logical structure; it seems to be more like a collection of observations rather than a cohesive argument. You must ensure that there is a clear introduction setting the scene for your discussion, followed by body paragraphs that each focus on a separate point, eventually leading to a clear conclusion that summarizes your argument and restates your position.
supported main points
Main ideas are presented but not fully developed. You should support your main points with detailed elaboration, including explanations and examples that are directly relevant to the topic. Additionally, don't forget to use cohesive devices such as linking words to show the relationship between ideas and to help guide the reader through your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.