Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #crime #prison #sentences #alternative

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Some societies assume that

prison

Use synonyms

is a

comprehend

Replace the word

comprehended

show examples

choices

Fix the agreement mistake

choice

show examples

to mitigate

crimes

Use synonyms

Conversely

Linking Words

, others ensure that many other appropriate choices to reduce it rather than

jail

Use synonyms

. I believe that there are many ways to make

criminals

Use synonyms

beneficial for the country. The reason

Change preposition

for

show examples

prison

Use synonyms

is still comprehends

Change the verb form

is still comprehended

is still comprehending

show examples

because of long duration in

Remove the article

apply

show examples

jail

Use synonyms

can reduce the

crimes

Use synonyms

initiate

Wrong verb form

initiated

show examples

. The uncomfortable

neighborhood

Change the spelling

neighbourhood

show examples

creates some people

would

Correct pronoun usage

who would

show examples

not

doing

Verb problem

commit

show examples

crimes

Use synonyms

anymore.

For instance

Linking Words

, bank robbers who had

Use synonyms

jail's

Change noun form

jail

show examples

experiences tend

Change preposition

apply

show examples

not to redo what they did.

Moreover

Linking Words

, many people

are agree

Change the verb form

agree

show examples

that they worth

to get

Change the verb form

getting

show examples

that.

Thus

Linking Words

, the agreement from some of

societies

Add an article

the societies

show examples

is effective. Rather than giving them

long

Add an article

a long

show examples

time in

Remove the article

apply

show examples

jail

Use synonyms

;

however

Linking Words

, it will

brings

Wrong verb form

bring

show examples

Correct the article-noun agreement

apply

show examples

unproductive citizens to the country. Many

Change preposition

apply

show examples

criminals

Use synonyms

are young and have many chances to get a better life. The government nowadays have

an alternatives

Correct the article-noun agreement

an alternative

alternatives

show examples

for

criminals

Use synonyms

to be more productive

their

Change preposition

in their

show examples

judging period. Prisons in some developed countries;

for example

Linking Words

they

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

provide some activities

such

Linking Words

as handcrafting, gardening, and cooking.

Linking Words

This

Correct determiner usage

These

show examples

activities not only give them

activity

Fix the agreement mistake

activities

show examples

to do but

also

Linking Words

can

be motivated

Wrong verb form

motivate

show examples

them to become

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

better person since they will be useful when they are free. In my perspective, it is the liability of the commission to reduce crime rates. By giving some adequate activities

while

Linking Words

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

prison

Use synonyms

, the commission will have other productive citizens and can use them in some parts of the city since they have many experiences in

jail

Use synonyms

Therefore

Linking Words

, the government's notion will be precise

Change preposition

show examples

reducing

crimes

Use synonyms

. In conclusion, some people believe that with long period

criminals

Use synonyms

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

prison

Use synonyms

, it is suit

with

Change preposition

for

show examples

what they did.

However

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

crime mitigation can be beneficial for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

criminals

Use synonyms

if their decision-maker have many good ideas. I believe that the government must be aware

Change preposition

show examples

all of their citizens

moreover

Linking Words

their

criminals

Use synonyms

to give them

better

Add an article

a better

show examples

life.

Submitted by re.li on Wed Dec 20 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response

Task response requires more precise statement of your position. Your opinion is not clearly stated in the introduction.

Task Achievement

Support your main points with more detailed examples to strengthen your argument and task achievement score.

Coherence & Cohesion

Improve essay structure with clear topic sentences and better paragraphing; each paragraph should focus on one main idea.

Coherence & Cohesion

Sentences often lack clarity and may confuse the reader, affecting the coherence of the essay. Focus on concise and clear sentence construction.

Coherence & Cohesion

Transitional words and phrases should be used to better connect ideas and paragraphs.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

315 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

8
band
We live in a world of technology these days. While the internet brings with it clear advantages, the problems in terms of control and security of information outweighs the advantages. To what extent do you agree
The recent decade has changed our daily routines turbulently due to internet development and its prominence. While there are an immense number of advantages like permanent connection with family or friends, doing a job digitally and searching for any information still, some people believe that because of a lack of security, its benefits have outweighed with disadvantages. I strongly disagree with them for two reasons: cybersecurity now is at the highest level and you can secure your information safely and there are some protected apps where you can keep your details confidently.
7.5
band
Some people think parents should read or tell stories to children, while others think parents need not do that, as children can read books, watch TV or movies by themselves. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Some people argue that parents should read or tell stories to their children, while others believe that it is unnecessary as children can read books or watch TV and movies on their own. Both views have their merits, but I believe that parental involvement in storytelling is crucial for a child's development.
7
band
Some people think that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters such as food, clothes and entertainment is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decision about matters that affect them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
It is true that all parents want to provide the best for their children, but they may approach education in different ways since not every adult member is well aware of the indispensable role of orientation in each child's growth and changeable development milestones. Some adults believe that allowing children to make their own food, clothing, and entertainment choices will lead to their becoming selfish people who only think about themselves and show less empathy for others, while others believe that children should make their own decisions. From my perspective, I fiercely agree that children learn how to solve their own difficulties in order to be independent. In my essay, I will go over both of these points in further detail.
7
band
A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
In the modern era, an individual's worth is often judged based on one's social standing and net worth, while other non-materialistic aspects such as humility and trust are seen to be non-essential. I personally reckon that this sentiment is true because people with such backgrounds continue to receive better treatment than others.
6.5
band
Computers are often argued to be the most important invention of the last hundred years. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
It is worldwide debated whether computers were the most significant innovation of the previous century. The writer of this essay no doubt advocates this statement as computers play a decisive role in our lives and they laid the foundations for future enhancement of technology, and standard of living.

Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

We live in a world of technology these days. While the internet brings with it clear advantages, the problems in terms of control and security of information outweighs the advantages. To what extent do you agree

Computers are often argued to be the most important invention of the last hundred years. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.