There is an increasing amount of advertising directed at children, encouraging them to buy toys and snacks. Many parents are worried that these advertisements put too much pressure on children, while some advertisements claim that they provide useful information to children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Advertising sectors are
widely
nowadays so that some Change the word
wide
advartisers
are doing Correct your spelling
advertisers
the
target Correct article usage
apply
at
Change preposition
apply
children
and sell Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
toys
and Use synonyms
snacks
, though some Use synonyms
advartisers
Correct your spelling
advertisers
are
want to give useful Unnecessary verb
apply
informations
to Change the wording
information
pieces of information
the
Correct article usage
apply
children
. Use synonyms
Parents
are worried about the Use synonyms
advertisements
and they want to give useful Use synonyms
informations
to their Change the wording
information
pieces of information
children
via Use synonyms
advertisements
. In my opinion, some Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
apply
children
are provided about their social study via online Use synonyms
advertisements
so Use synonyms
i
think that's Change the capitalization
I
good
Correct article usage
a good
ideas
. Fix the agreement mistake
idea
On the other
Linking Words
Hand
, Selling Fix capitalization
hand
toys
and Use synonyms
snacks
for Use synonyms
children
Use synonyms
on
Change preposition
in
advertisements
are supported to develop Use synonyms
Use synonyms
children's
Change preposition
of children's
pleasure
.
Many Use synonyms
copetative
on Correct your spelling
competitors
market
Correct article usage
the market
lead
to Wrong verb form
led
develop
Replace the word
the development
to
our modern lifestyles. That's Change preposition
of
effected
our life and Correct your spelling
affected
chirdern's
Correct your spelling
children's
education
. In fact, Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
children
Use synonyms
able
to get what they want even when they are young. They would get it and don't be afraid Add a missing verb
are able
anything
wrong. In many cases, the advertisement's sectors are included for Change preposition
of anything
children
because they sell Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
toys
, Use synonyms
snacks
and other things Use synonyms
such
as games. They Linking Words
also
make promotions for selling to the Linking Words
children
. Many Use synonyms
parents
are Use synonyms
pirority
their Correct your spelling
priority
children
health, development and Use synonyms
education
. So, they care and too much worry about the product and their Use synonyms
advertisements
. Use synonyms
On the other hand
, the Linking Words
children
Use synonyms
able
to develop their research skills Add a missing verb
are able
doing
something Change preposition
by doing
such
as buying Linking Words
toys
and Use synonyms
snacks
when they see Use synonyms
the
advertising online or Correct article usage
apply
TV
. Change preposition
on TV
For example
, my Linking Words
nephaw
can use and manage Correct your spelling
nephew
upon
the Change preposition
apply
advertisements
, Use synonyms
although
; he was 7 years old. Because he always Linking Words
see
the Change the verb form
sees
avdertisments
for Correct your spelling
advertisements
advertisement
childern
online. That's why we need Correct your spelling
children
advertisements
for Use synonyms
children
.
In our childhood, we create Use synonyms
the
Correct article usage
apply
pleasure
with family and Use synonyms
friend
. Fix the agreement mistake
friends
Likewise
, our Linking Words
chidren
would like to do that but the Correct your spelling
children
time
are changing so Fix the agreement mistake
times
style
of living Correct article usage
the style
are
modified, too. Later 2020, Correct subject-verb agreement
is
the
Correct article usage
apply
children
they search Use synonyms
their
Change preposition
for their
pleasure
and information for Use synonyms
education
Use synonyms
such
as books, Linking Words
toys
, Use synonyms
snacks
, Use synonyms
Correct word choice
and cloths
cloths
from online platforms. They can able to research and discuss with their friends about the Correct your spelling
clothes
advertisements
. Something Use synonyms
cann't
be Correct your spelling
can't
understand
Wrong verb form
understood
for
Change preposition
by
parents
. Use synonyms
Parents
need to learn from their Use synonyms
children
about new Use synonyms
style
of Fix the agreement mistake
styles
peasure
Correct your spelling
pleasure
pressure
in
Change preposition
apply
children
. So that the Use synonyms
parents
can Use synonyms
be understand
their Change the verb form
understand
children
's health, Use synonyms
education
and life Use synonyms
pleasure
. Advertisers are making Use synonyms
to
more sell for Change preposition
apply
children
's accessories and Use synonyms
included for
good Wrong verb form
including
idea
for their products. Fix the agreement mistake
ideas
Nowaday
they make more Correct your spelling
Nowadays
safe
for Correct word choice
safer
children
. Use synonyms
For example
, in our country Linking Words
Change the capitalization
Myanmar
myanmar
the Add a comma
myanmar,
advitisers
show the Correct your spelling
advertisers
products
quality in the Change noun form
product's
products'
advertisments
. Correct your spelling
advertisements
Children
would be tested in their Use synonyms
life
.
In conclusion, Fix the agreement mistake
lives
Encouraing
of Correct your spelling
Encouraging
advertisements
Use synonyms
are
not big Correct subject-verb agreement
is
cases
for our Fix the agreement mistake
case
children
. So, Use synonyms
as
Correct word choice
apply
parents
Use synonyms
should'nt
be worried about that too much. Our Correct your spelling
shouldn't
children
can Use synonyms
critize
the Correct your spelling
criticise
benifit
of Correct your spelling
benefit
benefits
advertisements
in the modern world that we liveUse synonyms
.
Change preposition
in.
Submitted by mjifinanceassistant on
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introduction/conclusion
Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction that presents the topic and a clear conclusion that summarises your main points and opinion. This helps the reader understand your position and the structure of your argument.
logical structure
Develop a clear logical structure within paragraphs and across the essay. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and sequential information that support that idea. Use linking words to connect sentences and ideas, helping the reader follow your logic.
supported main points
Support your main points with clear, detailed, and relevant examples. Examples should be specific and directly related to the point you are making, they should clarify and illustrate your argument, not just restate your point.
complete response
The response must fully address all parts of the task, presenting a clear position throughout the response. Make sure to discuss both views presented in the prompt and your own opinion cohesively to achieve a complete response.
clear comprehensive ideas
Make sure your ideas are clear and easily understood. Avoid overcomplicated sentences or vocabulary that might confuse the reader. Comprehensive ideas are critical for the reader to understand your points fully.
relevant specific examples
Include relevant and specific examples to back up your points. Examples should be related to the ideas you are discussing and help to illustrate your arguments effectively.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite